Chandler and Monica, 9th Season, My Way
by Becca Bing
Summary: *Epilogue* Christmas with the Bings. Please read and review!
1. tow phoebe lets it slip

TOW Phoebe Lets It Slip

Ok, hi, this is my first fic, so please don't judge me too harshly, but if you have something to say, tell me. Just don't be nasty about it b/c I'll probably run in my closet and cry. And you don't want me to cry. Oh, and I think my idea is kind of original...well sort of, but if it happens to be like your fic, I swear it wasn't intentional. Besides, according to some (by some, I mean my English teacher), the best stories come from other stories. Ok, well I think I butchered that, but you know what I mean. 

What You Should Know: Chandler's in Tulsa, and Monica's in NY. Everything happened up until...I dunno, I guess, tow Phoebe's Birthday. It doesn't really matter though. Just know that this will be going on my own timeline and since in TV they can mess up time, so can I. Umm...this part of the fic only deals briefly with other characters besides Monica and Phoebe, and Chandler and Ross never show up in this one. Not much really happens, like action wise, but it's leading up, so be patient. 

Disclaimer: The characters in this fic are owned by their creators and NBC; definitely not by me. I'm just merely borrowing them for my story.  

Monica paced up and down her apartment, as she nervously chewed on her fingernails. She stopped abruptly to stare at the telephone, but after a few moments, she began passing once again. 

"Ok Monica, stop this!" she reprimanded. She then sat down on the sofa and turned on the television. She flipped through the channels, but after finding nothing to watch, she shut it off. 

Frustrated she yelled, "Damn television! Why is there nothing at all to watch?"

"Talking to televisions doesn't work," Phoebe stated as she entered the apartment "Trust me, I've tried it before. They just don't listen." 

"Yeah..." she replied, distracted. 

"So, what's up?" Phoebe asked casually as she sat down next to Monica on the sofa.

Monica replied quickly, "N...nothing's up! Why would you think something's up?"

"I was just trying to be friendly, but ya know whatever."

"I'm sorry Pheebs, I'm just having a bad day."

"Wanna talk about it?"

"No, that's ok."

"Ok whatever, Miss...nervy..."Phoebe remarked as she got up and walked in the kitchen. 

Suddenly, the phone rang, and Monica jumped up abruptly to reach it before Phoebe. 

"It's MY phone, I'LL answer it!" 

"K...whatever." Said Phoebe as she reached for a glass. 

"Hello?" Monica said into the phone, her hands shaking from anticipation. 

After a brief pause Monica asked, "Oh...so, you're sure it's positive?"

Phoebe perked up at this remark, and watched Monica talking on the phone intently, trying to figure out what Monica was so nervous about. 

"O...k thank you," after a pause she added, "No, no, it's a good thing; I'm just shocked." 

"Ok, thanks. I'll set up an appointment soon." 

She hung up the phone, stunned by the news she had just received. Monica then noticed that Phoebe was in the room, and would most likely be interesting in what the phone call was about. 

"Not now." Monica remarked simply and firmly, as she grabbed her purse and jacket and left the apartment. 

"I wonder what that was about." She paused and continued, "There's no one but me in here. Hmm...well I AM my biggest fan. So Pheebs, wanna hear about my day?"

"Sure!" She replied to herself. 

"Great. Well first I had the most interesting conversation with the cab driver on my way to work today. It turns out he's an illegal alien, but..." she paused momentarily and realized, "It's boring to talk to myself. Maybe there's someone at the coffee house to talk to." She then grabbed her coat and bag and left the apartment.  

     After a few hours, Monica entered the coffee house and ordered a coffee from the counter. She looked around and saw that only Phoebe was there, sitting on their usual couch. Phoebe was reading a magazine and sipping her coffee as Monica approached her.

"Hey," Monica said as she sat down on the couch next to her. 

"Hi, so what's up? If I'm allowed to ask..."

Monica stared at her, puzzled, and then remembered her earlier conversation with Phoebe. She smiled uneasily, "Yeah...I'm really sorry about that."

"It's ok." 

Phoebe stared at Monica for a moment, then ventured back onto the topic. "What were you so edgy about?" 

"It's nothing. Well it IS something, but I really can't tell you."

"Why not? Is it bad? Is Chandler dying? I always knew Chandler would be the first out of the six of us to die, but I didn't think it would be this soon!"

Monica interrupted her before she could go on. "No, nothing bad! It's good, very good. I just can't tell you right now."

"Are you planning my birthday party?"

"Uhh...no. Besides, your birthday was last month."

"Well, that doesn't mean you shouldn't start planning my next one!"

"Ok, yeah, you're right." Monica looked at her competitively, "So, are you planning mine?"

"Umm...yeah sure..." Phoebe lied.

"Right." Monica replied, not believing her.

     Phoebe picked up her magazine again, and began flipping through the pages. She then turned to Monica and asked, "Will you ever tell me?"

"I will...it's just something Chandler and I need to discuss first, that's all."

"Ok so what if I guess what it is? Then you haven't told me, but I guessed. And you can't lie to me and tell me I guessed wrong, when I was really right."

Monica contemplated the suggestion for a moment and then replied, "Okay!" 

"Ok...yay!" Phoebe enthused. 

"I've been waiting so long to talk about it!"

"Ok so it's something good, but not Chandler dying..."

Monica gives Phoebe a long as Phoebe continues, "Ok, so something good...something good."

"Oh come on!"

"Ok, ok test results are positive..." Phoebe pondered for a moment and then said sadly "Are YOU dying?"

"No! Why would that be a positive thing for me?" 

Phoebe thought about this for a moment and answered, "Because you hate your life?"

"I don't hate my life!"

"Ok, just testing," she continued, "Yeah, well I wouldn't hate my life either if I were married to Chandler."

Again Monica gave her a look and said, "o...k...get back on topic here!"

"Right, right, ok...you quit your job?"

"No, I just got a new job, remember?"

"Oh...right."

"Do you ever listen to anyone?"

"Of course I do," she paused momentarily, "Ok, no, no I do not."

Monica rolled her eyes, and urged her to continue guessing. 

Phoebe gasped, "Are you cheating on Chandler?"

"Oh my God!" Monica screamed, "It doesn't have to do with anything bad remember?!"

"Right..."

"Ok, you know what?" Monica asked agitated. 

"What?"

"I'm gonna...I'm gonna...be sick!" Monica then dashed to the bathroom as quickly as she could.

Phoebe sat there for a moment, and then a look of realization came over her face, "ooooh...she's pregnant!" Phoebe whispered to herself, "I would've never guessed that in a million years!" 

     Just then, Rachel and Joey entered the coffee house, Rachel holding Emma in her arms. "Aww, come on, let her spend the day with me. Please!" He begged as he gave her a sad puppy dog look. 

Rachel sighed, "Ok fine, but only three hours. And you'd better be careful with my baby! Remember, she can't be fixed with glue, unlike that chair of Monica's you broke last year."

"I can't believe she hasn't realized anything yet." Joey smiled as he sat down next to Phoebe, "You would think Monica would realize, since it's ya know, Monica's chair."

Rachel and Phoebe nodded in agreement, and then Phoebe said, "Well, I think she has other things on her mind." 

"Yeah? Like what?" Rachel asked, her need for gossip increasing. 

"Nothing."

"Come on Pheebs, tell us!" Joey demanded. 

"I'll tell you later. Monica's coming."

"Hey guys! I'm gonna take off now, see ya later."

"Mon, can I talk to you for a minute before you go?"

"Yeah, sure." Monica motioned for them to sit at the table in the window. 

"Are you pregnant?"

"Yes, finally, someone knows! It feels so good to know that someone else knows."

"And Chandler doesn't know?"

"No."

"Well, good luck with that." Phoebe said, as she walked towards the sofa again. 

Monica stood there, then shook her head, knowing Phoebe would not be discussing this with her yet. 

"So...what's up with her?" Rachel asked, excitedly.

"Ok, well she doesn't want people knowing yet because Chandler doesn't know, but, I guessed. So if you guys guess, then I don't see why I can't tell you."

"Is Chandler dying?!" Joey asked, with his eyes wide with fear. 

"No, but I asked that, too. We know he's going to pass soon though. I mean it's so obvious..."

"Phoebe!"

"Right, ok so it's something good,"

"Something good...something good..." Rachel repeated, concentrating on the task at hand. 

"Ok, I'm getting bored of the guessing game, so I'm just gonna say it. She's pregnant!" 

Both Joey and Rachel gasped, and then Rachel jumped up excitedly. "Oh this is _so_ great! Our kids are going to be close in age! I'm so happy!"

"Yeah, me too! Maybe they'll name their kid Joey, unlike some people."

"Joey, It's Monica. Don't you know that she's known what to name her kids since she was like five?"

Joey pouted, "You're right."

"Ok, so guys," Phoebe began, "You cannot tell Monica you know!"

Joey and Rachel nodded, but were soon startled to hear someone clear their throat. 

"Uh oh," whispered Joey to Rachel. They both looked down at their coffees suddenly. 

"Uhh..." Phoebe began nervously, "Hey Mon, what's up?"

Please read and review! Remember, not too mean. It should get more interesting, I hope. Thanks for taking the time to read my fanfic. To be continued soon!


	2. tow all the interruptions

TOW All The Interruptions 

       Hi again, I'm back for part 2 of my fic. Thanks for all the good reviews. I was shocked. You people are so nice! Plus, the fact that you all like Friends, just makes you better. No one at my school watches it. Like yesterday, my Chemistry teacher asked who had watched Survivor, and about ¾ of my class raised their hands. The rest of them probably never watch TV anyways. How could you watch Friends and not Survivor? I just don't understand. Ok so here's part 2, I hope you like it!****

**What You Should Know:** Everything that I said in the first chapter still holds. ****

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. The people of NBC and the creators own them. I am merely borrowing them for my story. 

"Uhh…" Phoebe began nervously, "Hey Mon, what's up?"

"Phoebe, I can't believe you told them!" Monica yelled angrily.

"I'm so sorry, it's just…well I couldn't keep it a secret. I'm so sorry. I mean, usually Rachel's the one who can't keep secrets, not me."

"Hey, I can keep secrets!" Rachel defended.

"Please, let's not get on this topic AGAIN!" Monica demanded. 

Rachel stopped talking and went to get more coffee, obviously feeling offended by the looks she gave them. 

"Ok, Mon, I'm so sorry, I really am. It's just so big and really, really great. I couldn't keep it in."

Monica looked at her for a minute, "Ok, well I'm letting you off the hook, but don't tell anyone else! Especially not Chandler. That goes for the rest of you, too." She said, as she pointed her finger sternly. 

"We would never…" Rachel stopped off Monica's look, "We won't tell."

"Yeah, promise," Joey agreed, then asked, "Aren't you going to tell Chandler?" 

Monica hesitated for a moment and answered quietly, "Well…yeah. It's just been so hard, since he's been in Tulsa and all." Monica's angry demeanor had suddenly changed to sadness after that statement.  

"Aww, Mon, It'll be okay." Consoled Rachel.

"Yeah, totally." Phoebe agreed, "I mean, you two are married, and you've been trying for a baby."

"That's the thing! We _were_ trying for a baby. But we decided to stop trying until Chandler could move back to New York permanently. He didn't want to be a part time father, and I don't want him to be, either."

The rest of them agreed, as Rachel rubbed her back soothingly.

Monica continued, "I mean, it's so hard to be pregnant without a husband around to help out. Plus it seems like it would be unfulfilling, ya know, to not have the baby's father there." 

"Yeah, I know," Rachel said under her breath.

"So do I!" Phoebe added bitterly. 

"Oh right," Monica looked away sheepishly, "Sorry."

"Hun, it'll be okay." Rachel concluded, "after all, we'll all be here for you, when Chandler can't, that is."

"Yeah Mon, and since I'm across the hall, I'll be there whenever you need me." Joey added.

"Thanks you guys, that's so sweet," Monica said holding back tears. 

"Hunny…" Rachel went over to hug Monica, and Phoebe and Joey soon joined them. 

"I'm so happy!" said Rachel happily as she held a sleeping Emma in her arms. 

"Me too!" added Phoebe.

"So am I, but Mon?" Joey ventured carefully, "Can you name the baby Joey? I mean I will be helping out and all…"

"NO!" Monica yelled and a frightened Joey ran hastily out of the coffee house. 

"So…" Rachel looked Monica straight in the eyes, "When are you going to tell Chandler?"

"Well, I was thinking that I would tell him tomorrow when he comes home from Tulsa. I'm going to make him a nice, romantic dinner, and then, break the news to him. I even have a speech planned out."

Phoebe and Rachel were smiling, "That sounds so sweet. I wish I could've been able to do that!" Rachel whined.

"Me too!" Phoebe added. 

"Sorry, but you'll get the chance soon enough." Monica consoled, then she got a frightened look on her face, "What if he doesn't want the baby? What if he makes me get rid of it? What if…"

"Mon, Calm down, just calm down!" Phoebe yelled.

"Yeah, Mon, Chandler would _never _make you get rid of you baby! You know he wouldn't." Monica looked away, guilty.

"Plus," Phoebe added, "Even though your baby's not planned, I'm sure he'll be thrilled. He really wants to be a father."

"Yeah, you guys are right. What was I so nervous about?"

"It's hormones," Phoebe stated and Rachel nodded her head enthusiastically. 

"Ok, I'm tired, so I'm gonna go. I'll see you all later. Thanks for your help." 

Monica exited the coffee house, and both Rachel and Phoebe were still smiling. 

"She's _so _lucky. She's the only one of us who got married and is gonna have a baby _with _the father as the husband, too."

"Speak for yourself," Phoebe replied boldly.

"What do you mean?" Rachel asked confused, "You married a gay ice skater and had your brothers babies. _That's _how you wanted it to happen?"

Phoebe, now unsure of herself, "Uh-huh, that is correct," She got up abruptly, "I have to go now." Phoebe shuffled quickly out of Central Perk, half out of self-pity and half out of embarrassment. Rachel just sat back, shook her head, and continued drinking her coffee. 

The next day, Monica and Rachel were sitting in Monica and Chandler's apartment. "So, he's gonna be home soon," Rachel reminded Monica excitedly, "His flight should've come in by now!"

Agitated at her friend's consistent reminder, "I know Rach. And I knew it 10 minutes ago, too!"

Looking away, ashamed, "I'm sorry. I'm just so excited."

A huge grin formed on Monica's face, "Me too!" She replied ecstatically.  

       A half and hour passed, and Chandler entered the apartment. Rachel was sitting alone at the kitchen table. 

"Hi Rachel," he greeted her as he entered, "Where's Mon?" 

"She's in her room." Rachel smiled, "I'll leave you two alone."

Rachel exited the apartment, and Chandler called out, "Where's my wonderful wife?" 

"Hey sweetie," she greeted as she exited their room. They shared a passionate kiss, and after the kiss, Chandler held Monica.

"I missed you _so_ much," he said lovingly as he held her tightly in his arms.  

"I missed you _so _much, too" Monica said woefully, "I wish you didn't have to go."

"Me too," he replied sadly, "me too."

"Okay!" Monica said, with false happiness, "Let's not dwell on this now. I have dinner waiting for you."

A smile formed on Chandler's lips and he kissed her forehead. "Thanks babe."

She smiled back up at him, "No prob, hubby." 

       After recalling the events of their week apart and finishing their meal, Monica and Chandler made their way to the sofa. Monica decided that it was the perfect time to tell Chandler her news. "So Chandler," she began nervously, "I have something to tell…" 

Suddenly, his cell phone began to ring, and she could not finish her sentence. "Crap! Hold on a sec. Mon," he said as he grabbed his cell phone, "Hello? John, I'm at home in New York with my wife, can't this wait?" He paused and listened to the person on the other side of the phone. "Ok, I'll get right on it." He turned to Monica, "I'm _so _sorry sweetie, but I really have to do some work, it's important, I…"

Monica cut him off, "It's ok, I understand."

Chandler gave Monica a sad smile and kissed her cheek, "I love you."

"I know," she answered unhappily, as Chandler took out his laptop and continued talking on the phone. 

       The next morning, Rachel and Phoebe entered Monica and Chandler's apartment together. Monica was sitting at the table with her head down. 

"Hey, how'd it go?" Rachel questioned. 

"Considering the fact that she looks dead tired with her head down on the table," Phoebe concluded, "and the fact that Chandler's still asleep, I'm guessing it went well."

"Well, your wrong!"

"What happened?" Rachel questioned.

"Well, I was about to tell him, but then some guy from his work called him, and he spent the rest of the night and early morning up working." She recalled sadly. 

"Well, you still have time." Phoebe declared.

"Yeah!" Monica perked up slightly, "He doesn't leave until Sunday. That gives me like two and a half days!"

"Well actually," Rachel began, "Doesn't he spend one of those days with Joey?" 

"Right," Monica began to lose her enthusiasm again. 

"That still gives you like a day and a half."

"Yeah…ok."

"Ok, hun, go get some sleep. Have you been up all night worrying?"

"Yeah." Monica replied softly.

"It'll be ok." Phoebe comforted, as she and Rachel turned to go. Monica sat down on the sofa, and fell fast asleep. 

       "Ok so, Chandler," Monica began the next night, "There's something I need to tell you." 

"Yeah?" Chandler asked, looked at her with the concern clearly written on his face. 

"Well, umm…so last week I hadn't been feeling so…"

Again, Monica was interrupted. This time, it was Joey who barged through their door. "Man, you gotta help me!" Joey demanded.

"Joey!" Monica yelled back at him.

"What, I need Chandler more than _you_ do right now, let me borrow him!" He said as he pulled Chandler by the arm out of his apartment.

"Woah, woah," Chandler started, "What do you need me for?"

Joey answered urgently, "Girl problems!"

Chandler snickered, "_You _have girl problems?"

"Not _those_ kind of problems," Joey explained, "See, she's smart and keeps saying words that I don't know."

Chandler looked at him like her was crazy, "So get a dictionary, I'm spending time with Monica. We've barely had an hour alone together!"

"Yeah, ok, no time for sob stories, you have to tell me man, she asked me if I could show her where the loo is. And so I told I didn't know and I'd be right back!"  

"Chandler laughed, "Is she British?"

"I dunno, she might be. She kind of sounds different then most girls I've dated."

Chandler gave him a look, "Well does she have an accent?"

Exasperated Joey answered, "I don't know, I don't listen long enough."

"Yeah, ok…" 

"Do you think she is?"

"She could be." He continued, "and it means bathroom."

"Oh, well couldn't she have just _said _that?"

Chandler ignored his comment. "I can't believe you don't know if she's British."

"Well, she could _Chinese _for all I know. Wait out here, in case I need you again."

"Ok, but Joe…"

"Yeah?"

"_Don't_ come out here naked."

"You got it!"

       The weekend came and went, and it was time for Chandler to go back to Tulsa. Monica attempted, for one last time, to tell Chandler her news.

"Ok, Chandler, before you leave…" she started, as he collected some scattered items into a small bag, "I really need to talk to you."

"Ok Mon, but make it quick, my flight's in 2 hours. And you know how the airports are today…"

"Oh, wow, only two hours? But you should be there by now!" She paused, "But that's ok, because we should talk."

"Ok…?"

"Well, as I told you, I wasn't feeling very well and I went to the doctor."

"Are you ok?" Chandler asked worried, "You're not dying are you?!"

"Oh my God! Why does everyone ask that?! No, I'm not dying."

"Ok," Chandler stated relieved, "Phew, for a minute there I thought…"

"Well, don't." Monica said firmly, "Anyway, I went to the doctor and I found out why I hadn't been feeling well, and it's not bad news, don't worry," she said as she saw him fidgeting nervously.

"No, I know it's just…I really have to go, so could you speed it up?"

Monica stared at him for a moment, holding back her tears. "Ya know what? I'll tell you later. This isn't something that should be rushed."

"No, tell me now, I don't want to live with anticipation!" Chandler whined.

Just then, Rachel and Ross walked in. 'Hey Mon," Ross started, "Can you watch Emma for a bit?" He saw Chandler still there, "Hey Chandler, your still here?"

"No, actually, I'm in Tulsa," Chandler quipped, and Ross gave him a stare.

"Yeah, well he's leaving now," Monica said bitterly.

"Ok well, what do you say Mon?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah sure," she answered distractedly.

"Sorry, Mon, but I have to go now. I guess I'll just live in anticipation for a few days." Chandler stated.

"Yeah," Monica agreed sadly, "I guess you will."

Chandler went over and hugged Monica. He said into her hair, "I'm sorry we didn't get to spend much time together."

Monica nodded on his shoulder, not able to speak in fear of crying. He continued, "I'll see you soon babe, bye." He kissed her passionately, and then headed for the door. 

"Oh and Chandler," Ross began, "Remember not to be late on Thursday. We're going to my parents for Thanksgiving."

"We are?" he asked, "Since when?"

"Since yesterday," Ross stated.

"Ok, bye," Chandler stated as he walked out the door. When in the hall he mumbled, "Uch…their parents…" he then said sarcastically, "I'm sure my Thanksgiving will be great this year."

Ok well there's Chapter 2! Please Read and Review. Wow, I'm so proud that I've made it this far. Sit tight, chapter 3 should be up shortly. I hope that the British thing doesn't upset anyone. I didn't mean anything bad by it. I think English accents are the coolest! If I were English, wow I'd talk all the time.  


	3. tow chandler ruins the moment

TOW Chandler Ruins the Moment

              Ok I'm back with my 3rd chapter. Thanks for all the positive reviews; it's really been inspiring! Crap, I missed Friends because I was writing this! Wow, that's stupid of me. Well, there's still an episode on at 7, lol. Ok, well, I hope that you're still enjoying my story. 

**What You Should Know: **Just that everything from the first 2 chapters still holds, and you should probably read those first. 

**Disclaimer: **I don't own them, yada, yada, yada.

              Phoebe, Rachel, and Joey were all sitting around Monica's kitchen table, while Monica was feverishly cleaning the apartment. 

"Mon," Phoebe commented, "You're in your freaky clean mode."

Monica gave her an angry look, and went back to scrubbing the coffee table. 

"Yeah, she's right. What's wrong?" questioned Rachel.

"Nothing…I'm just nervous, that's all."

With a mouth full of food Joey said, "But it's not like we're eating here, so your parents aren't coming." 

"Eww, Joey, there's crumbs coming out of your mouth!" Monica yelled.

Joey looked away sheepishly, "Sorry Mon."

"Anyway, I know they aren't coming over here, I'm just so nervous."

"About seeing your parents or telling Chandler?" Rachel asked.

"A little bit of both." Off the others looks,  "Ok, a lot a bit of both."

"Just don't let your mother get to you," Phoebe advised, "No matter what she says."

"Yeah," Rachel agreed, "If she comments on your hair, just ignore her."

"On your clothes," Phoebe added, "Ignore her."

"On your job, husband, family, Ross…" Monica interrupted Rachel, "Enough, I get it!" 

          Just then, Ross entered the apartment holding Emma in a baby carrier. "So, is Chandler here yet?" He questioned.

"No," Monica answered, "But he called about 20 minutes ago to say he was on his way, so it shouldn't be long."

"Ok, good. I'm so excited. We get to show Emma off to everyone! She's just so adorable…" Ross cooed.  

Monica rolled her eyes, "I think I'm gonna go clean the bathroom," She stated and left the room. 

"What's with her?" Ross wondered.

"She's just having a tough day, so don't bug her." Rachel scolded.

"Yeah, your mom'll do enough for the both of you." Phoebe added.

"Phoebe?" Joey asked and pointed, "Can you pass the…" His arm hit a glass and spilled it. 

"What was that?" Monica asked from within the bathroom.

"Uh-oh…I think I'm gonna go." Joey stated as he ran out of the apartment.

"Yeah Joey, I'm coming too." Phoebe said.

"Don't forget me." Rachel added.

"Right behind ya." Commented Ross, as they all left the apartment.

"Guys?" Monica questioned as she walked back into the kitchen. 

"Uch, Joey!" Monica reprimanded, as she began to clean his spilled drink. 

After Monica finished cleaning, she laid on the sofa. Just as she was drifting off, the door opened and Chandler entered. 

"Hey Mon, tired?"

"Extremely," she stated as she got up and hugged him. "Ok we definitely don't wanna be late because we don't want to give my mother ammunition. So let's get a move on!"

"Ok, but I _just _got in!" Noticing Monica's look, "Ok, enough time, lets go!" Chandler stated as he grabbed his coat and left the apartment, with Monica following him. 

          As the group walked up the path towards the Geller residence, Monica held onto Chandler's hand tightly. 

"Mon, could you let up on your grip a bit?" Chandler questioned, as he winced in pain.

"No," Monica answered, "Take it like a man and suck it up!"

"Why don't you just…" 

"DON'T start with me!"

"Right, sorry, please, hold tighter!" 

They approached the door and Judy opened it and greeted everyone. When she got to Monica she said, "Mon dear, what is with your hair these days? It's like half curled half not…what is that? Either curl it or straighten it."

"Uh-huh," Monica replied distantly.

"So here's my little grand-daughter!" Jack cooed as he played with baby Emma. 

"Isn't she the sweetest?" Judy added, "So cute."

Jack and Judy continued to gush over Emma until Judy declared that the food was ready.  "So this year we get to eat _my_ turkey." Judy gloated, "It's much better than yours Monica dear. Yours is just too dry. What kind of chef has dry turkey?"

"Mom," Ross ventured, "I love Monica's turkey!"

The rest agreed with Ross, while Monica sat at the table biting her lip. 

"Stop biting your lip Monica. You're going to make the skin peal, not to mention get lip stick on your teeth."

"Sorry," Monica apologized through gritted teeth, "It's a bad habit."

"Yes, well it beats your habit of eating too much, I guess. So Ross, Rachel," she continued, "How are things going with my darling grand-daughter."

"Just great Judy, really."

"Yeah mom, she did the cutest thing with her hand today…" Ross began, as he prepared them for many stories of Emma. 

When Chandler saw that Judy and Jack were engrossed in Ross' stories, he turned to Monica and whispered, "So how you holdin' up?"

She just looked at him with sadness in her eyes. 

"That bad, huh?"

"You heard her!"

"Yeah, it's some of the worst yet that I've heard."

"Why can't she just be happy for me?"

"I don't know sweetie. I don't know."

          While they were sitting at the table beginning their desserts, Judy moved back to the subject of Monica. "So it must be straining on your marriage to have Chandler away so much, Monica."

"No, not really. We love each other enough to handle it." Monica answered confidently. 

"Oh please!" Judy huffed. 

"It's true, "Chandler assured his mother-in-law. 

Frustrated, Monica added, "Besides, dad spent most of his time away when Ross and I were growing up, but you two made it. Why are you so skeptical of us?"

Outraged by her daughter's accusation, but unable to think of an opposing argument, she changed topics. "So when am I getting another grandchild? I mean, you've been married for over a year now!"

"We're just waiting to see how Chandler's job goes before we start trying." Monica nervously said, obviously hating having to lie about the topic.

Chandler added, "Yeah, we want to be sure that everything is in perfect condition before we start our family."

"Well, yes, I could see you doing that if you were younger," Judy argued, "But Monica's already passed 30! By that time in my life, both Ross and Monica were born. Chandler, maybe you can make babies forever, but Monica sure can't," She then directed her comment to Monica, "You know, your not getting any younger." 

Again Monica bit her lip out of anger, "And stop biting your lip!" 

"You know what!" Monica shouted, unable to contain her anger, "That's it! I knew coming here was a bad idea. Your criticism towards me never ends! What do you want from me, huh? What do you want?" Judy stared at her daughter blankly, shocked by her reaction. "You criticized my job, but now I have a great job. You criticized my love life, but now I'm happily married. You bug me for a grandchild, and your getting one in seven months! What else do you want from me?!" With that, Monica ran out the front door, leaving seven shocked faces around the dinner table. 

          Slowly, the other heads turned towards Chandler's pale face, watching his reaction. His lips moved, but the only sound that came out of them was, "Flennin…" Then, he slowly regained his composition. "W..w…what did she say?" He questioned. 

"Hun," Rachel began, "She's pregnant."

"That's, that's, what I thought she said." He babbled. 

"She's pregnant!" Ross squeaked and pointed to Rachel accusingly, "And you knew?"

"I did, too!" Phoebe gloated.

"Me three!" Joey added.

"Woah…so I'm the last to know?" Ross asked insulted, "It's my sister's baby!"

"No your not the last to know," Phoebe added as she pointed towards Chandler, "I believe Mr. Pale face over there just found out, too."

"So she told you three," Judy gestured towards Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey, "But not her own family and husband?!" Judy asked insulted.

"No, actually, she never told us," Rachel explained. 

"Yeah," Phoebe continued, "I figured it out, since I was there when the doctor called to confirm her pregnancy. And then I blabbed to the others."

"Wow, now _this _is a Thanksgiving to remember, ey Chandler?" Jack joked to Chandler. 

"I…I have to go!" Chandler stated as he grabbed his coat. 

"Wait!" Ross yelled as he grabbed Chandler's arm, "Don't you _dare_ leave my sister pregnant and alone! Or else, I'm gonna kick your ass, like I threatened."

"Ooooh…Mr. Scary!" Phoebe mocked and laughed, but stop laughing when Ross gave her a stern look. 

"Hey, I'm not gonna leave her, okay? I'm not that shallow. I'm going to find her!"

"Oh, well in that case, get your ass out there!" Ross yelled, as Chandler ran outside. 

          "Monica?" Chandler called in the dark backyard of the house. He heard no answer, except for whimpering. "I know that whimpering," he whispered as ran to hear where it was coming from. 

"Mon, it's Chandler. I know you're out here!" Chandler stopped under a tree, and looked up. "Monica? What are you doing up there?" She still didn't answer, so he began to climb up the tree. However, he was unsuccessful and continuously fell down. After a few minutes he looked up again, "Ok, I can't get up there, but I really wanna talk to you. Will you please come down?" However, he still received no answer. "Come on Monica, I'm really worried about you." Finally, she relented and slid down the trunk of the tree. 

"Geez, I haven't climbed a tree since I was a kid." Chandler looked down and confessed, "Ok, no wait, I haven't climbed a tree since, well, ever." 

Monica smiled slightly and said, "I figured." 

Chandler sat down on the grass, and then pulled Monica down on top of him. "So should I start, or you?" He questioned as he twirled some of her hair around his finger. 

"You," She answered shyly.

"Ok, well, I'm so proud of you!" He praised.

"What why?" She asked, confused, as she turned to face him.

"Because," he explained, "You finally told off your mom! I've been telling you to do that for like ever. She deserves it, and you deserve to get those things off your chest." 

A small smile crossed Monica's lips; "It did feel pretty good, although I still feel like there's much more to be said."

"Yeah, well, it will take a lot more than just one outburst, but it's a start. I told my mom off 9 years ago, and it helped our relationship. Although I don't think it was ever _that_ bad." 

"Yeah, I remember." Monica went silent again. 

"So are we gonna talk about the other thing you said, or will I just pretend I don't know?" 

Monica looked down at the ground, but Chandler lifted her chin up again. "I…I'm sorry."

"So…that was what you had been trying to tell me last week?" Chandler realized, "Oh God Mon, I'm _so, so, so _sorry!"

"Why are you sorry?"

"Because…I should've let you tell me, but I let other things get in the way!"

"It's ok, really." 

"I'll make it up to you! I promise!" 

"It's ok, you already did."

"Huh?"

"You gave me what I've always wanted. A wonderful husband and now a child."

Chandler smiled broadly as he kissed Monica slowly and passionately. After a minute, tears began to stream down Monica's cheeks.

"What's wrong?" Chandler questioned.

"I had this all planned out! I was going to tell you in the most perfect way, but…" she began crying harder, "I ruined it!"

"No, no, you didn't ruin it. The news is so great, that it can never be ruined!"

"Really?" she asked, surprised. 

"Really," Chandler stated firmly, "But if you really want to tell me, then lets pretend I don't know yet."

Monica looked at him, scrunching her forehead out of confusion. 

"Well, that's what happened with my wedding proposal, remember? I tried to tell you, but it got ruined and you found out from Joey. So then I proposed anyway." 

"Right," Monica smiled at the memory.

"So, Mon, what is that you needed to tell me?"

"Well, I know that we said we would wait…"

"Wait for the horses to come in?" He quipped, and then Monica gave him a stern look, "What? If I didn't know what you were going to say, I would've made a remark, and you know it!" He paused, "I ruined the moment, didn't I?"

"Afraid so."

"I have a tendency to do that."

"So I've noticed."

"Ok, wait let's start over!"

"No, no, no, you don't deserve it."  

"Aww, come on, please!" He put his face near Monica's, still flat, stomach, "Don't you agree?"  

Monica laughed, "Let's go. I have some unfinished business to attend to."

"Fine!" Chandler huffed, as he put his arm around her protectively, and together they walked back towards the house.

Ok so that's part 3. Yay! Please Read and Review! Sorry that Jack has few lines, but I felt little need for him, since he really doesn't say much anyway. I think next chapter there may be more of him. Oh and I taped the 7:00 Friends on WB, just so you know. Phew! It's TOW Phoebe's Uterus. I'm gonna watch it later, because I'm gonna have to leave in the middle of the episode anyway, so I'll just wait to watch the entire thing. I haven't seen that episode in a while, but it's from 4th season, which is my favorite season! Although I am a huge Monica and Chandler fan, and there's no them till the very end, I think the plots and jokes are funniest that season. However, I don't like that they're not together and that Kathy's such a bitch. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and chapter 4 should be up shortly, hopefully some time tomorrow. Thanks for reading. 


	4. tow the confrontation

TOW the Confrontation

       I'm back for another chapter in my series! Yay, I'm so excited. Thanks for all the great. It's really nice. I think this chapter is a bit more dramatic than my others, but I tried to add some jokes in it, to make it lighter. It's nothing bad like a character dying; don't worry. I could never do that; I love them too much! And just to repeat, I changed the name of my series, b/c I didn't realize that I had the name of the first chapter as the name of my series. I'm just stupid like that sometimes. Ok most times, I admit it!J 

**What You Should Know: **Yet again, everything stands from my earlier chapters. You should probably read those first, if you haven't already.

**Disclaimer: **I own none of these characters, nor do I ever wish to. It would be way too big of a responsibility for me. I mean, I can't even stand taking care of my cats.

"Can you believe what _your _daughter said to me?" Judy questioned Jack, as she furiously scrubbed the pot in her hand.

"Well…it's like I've said in the past," Jack explained as he took the pot from her hand and dried it, "After all those things you've said to her, she's gonna come back and bite you in the ass with them."

"When did you say that before?"

"I dunno…before."

"Uh-huh, right," Judy said unconvinced, "She had NO right to speak to her own mother like that. Why, after all the sacrifices I've made for her…"

Ross entered the kitchen, interrupting Judy's rant, "We're gonna take off now. It's getting too late for Emma, and Joey's getting restless. 

"Monica will not leave until I have a word with her!" Judy demanded.

"Mom…"off his mother's look, "I'll…go get her."

       Ross, Joey, and Phoebe walked outside to where Chandler and Monica were sitting on the doorstep. "Uh, Mon," Ross started nervously, "Mom wants to speak with you."

"Whatever, I don't care. I can't deal with this now. I'm leaving." Monica stated as she rose from the stoop. 

Her mother and father then walked through the door and Judy called towards Monica's retreating figure, "You made this mess, now fix it!" 

Monica turned around and looked her mother straight in the eyes. Neither said a word, both angry from the earlier events of the evening. 

"Wow…" Phoebe started in a loud whisper to Joey, "It's like one of those westerns. I'm just waiting for them to take out their guns and talk like cowboys."

"I love westerns," Jack stated to Phoebe, "My favorite is The Alamo, especially when…" 

"Yeah, I agree," Phoebe said as she turned her head away.

"There's nothing to fix," Monica stated calmly, still staring her mother straight in the eyes.

"That's no way to speak to your own mother. Think of all I've done for you!"

"Think of what _you've_ done for _me_?" Monica mocked, "I am thinking of what you've done for me. I'm remember all those times you scolded me and made me feel worthless."

"How dare you!" 

"You know what," Monica chuckled bitterly, "You're right and I'm wrong, yet again. But I don't care. As of now, I no longer wish to see you, nor will my children ever see you!" 

Ross bit his lip as he heard those words come from Monica's mouth, as the rest stared at the scene unfolding in front of them, wide eyed at Monica's outburst. 

Monica turned to leave and then stated harshly, "Look _Mother_, Ross is biting his lip!" Ross immediately stopped biting his lip, and Monica continued, "What are you going to do about it?" She then walked away, and Chandler ran after her. The others, especially Judy, were shocked at what had happened. Hurt, Judy walked back inside her house and slammed the door. 

       "Mon," Chandler tried as they walked into their apartment, "Will you _please_ talk to me? You haven't said a word the entire ride home." When he saw Monica that Monica had made no attempt to talk, or even move, he put his arms around her. She then began to cry softly into his shoulder. 

"Shh…it's ok," Chandler soothed as he planted soft kisses on her head, "I wish I could do something to make the pain go away. How about a joke? I've got a million of those!" He attempted, but failed to even make her chuckle. He sighed, as he waited for her to speak. 

After a few minutes Monica whispered incoherently.

"What's that?" Chandler pressed. 

"How could I have been so mean?"

"It's not your fault. She had it coming to her, with all those years of torture she put you through."

"I'm gonna go to sleep." She stated as she walked towards their bedroom.

"I'll be there soon, I'm going to Joey's for a bit," he informed her. "Goodnight, I love you." 

Monica didn't answer; just turned and entered their room. 

       "I really wish there was something I could do for her," Chandler confessed to Joey, while they were playing foosball.

"I don't think I've ever seen her so upset, or mad either." Joey added, "Score!"

"Damnit!"

"My money's on Joey," Phoebe informed them, "Well, actually, since I didn't bet anything, it's not on either of you. But if I were betting, it would _so _be on Joey."

"Way to kick a man when he's down, Pheebs," Chandler remarked, causing Phoebe to look away sheepishly. 

Chandler continued, "She looked really upset and tired, so I figure I'll give her some space and let her sleep, and hopefully she'll be able to talk more." 

"It's not like Monica not to talk to anyone," Phoebe added thoughtfully, "She must be feeling really upset." Chandler just nodded and looked back towards the game sadly. 

       After ten minutes of playing, Joey chanted, "I win! Ha ha, I beat you. Ha ha I beat you!"

"You always beat him, what's the big deal?" Phoebe asked.

"Right," Joey looked away, disappointed.

"Thanks for the praise," Chandler added sardonically. 

"She wasn't praising you." Chandler looked at him and then Joey showed a look of comprehension, "Ohhhh!"

Just then, Ross entered Joey's apartment. "Hey guys," Ross began, "So…interesting night, eh?"

"You could say that again," Chandler remarked as he sat down on one of the stools. 

"I just don't get it. I've never seen Monica act that way. She really _was _out of line." 

"What!" Chandler defended, "How was she out of line?! It was that mother of yours that's been out of line. She deserved every word that came from Monica's mouth and much more!" 

"You're just saying that because she's your wife," Ross replied causally.

"No, Ross, I'm really not. Of course I love her and can't stand to see her in pain, but it's so much more than that." Ross looked at him confused, urging Chandler to continue, "You just don't understand. You've never been through what people like Monica have gone through. You've never been scorned unmercifully; never been made to feel like nothing more than the mere dirt of the ground! But she has, and to a lesser extent I have, too. This is something we share. It's not just her battle; it's mine, too. And if you cannot understand that, then, well, I think it would be best if you just keep your mouth shut." With that, he walked out angrily. 

"You should really listen to him," Phoebe advised, "He's actually making some sense for once."

"Oh what do you know?" Ross asked bitterly, "You're mom killed herself!" Frustrated, he grabbed his coat and briskly left the apartment. 

Joey and Phoebe were silent for a moment, and then Joey spoke up casually, "Wanna play some foosball?" 

"Yeah ok," Phoebe agreed as they both took their sides at the table. 

       Chandler entered the dark bedroom, silently changed into his pajamas, and carefully laid down on their bed. After a minute, Monica sat up, and Chandler did, too. "What is it?" He asked, concerned. 

"I can't sleep." She stated and then paused, "Should I apologize?" 

"Well, it's up to you, but I think you should. Be the bigger person. But only apologize for yelling, don't apologize for telling the truth." 

"Okay."

After a moment, Chandler asked, "Is it…weird?"

"Is what weird?"

"Knowing that there's a tiny person growing inside of you?"

"Incredibly." 

"Oh," He paused, and then continued to speak, "You thanked me earlier, but I never got to thank you."

"For what?"

"For giving _me _everything that _I've _wanted, too. The perfect wife, and soon a child, who I know will be perfect because part of it comes from you. The other part…well let's just hope the Geller genes are stronger than the Bing ones."

Monica smiled, "It's ok, as long as he doesn't inherit your sense of humor."

"Hey, I'm hilarious!"

"Of course you are." 

"Thank you." He paused and then stated, "You know what? I don't hate Thanksgiving anymore."

Monica smiled and kissed him, "Good, that's what I was hoping would finally happen.

"Good night Mon, I love you."

"Night Chandler, I love you, too."

"Good night my tiny baby," Chandler said softly, as he hugged Monica and placed his hands on her stomach. Then Chandler thought out loud, "It's amazing how I can love someone who I've never met so much."

Monica bit her lip, fighting her tears of happiness, as she drifted off into sleep, feeling comfortable in her husband's loving embrace. 

       The next morning, the gang was all congregated in Monica and Chandler's living room, although both Monica and Chandler were not in the room. Chandler exited from their bedroom, fully dressed, with Monica behind him in her robe. Chandler sat in the living room, while Monica made her way towards the kitchen.

"Mon?" Ross questioned. Chandler gave Ross a look, warning him not to mention anything, but Ross decided to ignore it. Monica finished pouring herself a cup of coffee and looked up. "What happened last night? Why were you acting like that?" 

"Please Ross, leave me alone." 

"You know," he continued, ignoring her plead, "Mom's really upset about what you said."

"She is?" Monica said with extreme guilt. 

"Yeah."

"I'm gonna apologize." 

"Good, I don't want to live with a broken family." Ross looked down at his hands and then continued, "I'm sorry that she always treated you this way. I should be more supportive of you, and I will be starting now."

Monica smiled, "Thanks, bro." Ross went to Monica in the kitchen and gave her a hug. 

"So, what are we all gonna do today?" Joey questioned as Monica and Ross joined them in the living room.

"Shopping, duh!" Phoebe stated.

"Yeah, it's Black Friday!"

"What's the big deal about Black Friday?" Joey asked.

"Lots of sales, that's the big deal!" Rachel stated excitedly. 

"I thought Black Friday was when people put those ashes on their faces."

"Yes, but they have sales to honor it," Chandler quipped.

"Oh."

"What? No they don't, Joey!" Ross corrected, "Your thinking of ash Wednesday."

"I take it you don't get to church much, do you?" Rachel questioned. 

"Nah, not really." Joey admitted.

"It gets in the way of his busy days of watching football and cartoons." Chandler added, jokingly. 

Phoebe nodded, "Makes sense." 

"Come on Mon!" Rachel whined, "It's time to do some shopping!" 

"Ok, ok, ok. Just let me get dressed." Monica looked at Rachel, "What are you on? Did you take pep pills or something?"

"No I just love shopping!"

"Yeah," Phoebe backed her up, "I get the same way when I conjure up dead spirits. The rest of the gang gave Phoebe a strange look and slowly moved away from her. "What? It's not _that _weird."

"No, it really is," Chandler admitted, as the rest of them nodded in agreement. 

"Oh well." Phoebe stated nonchalantly, "Come on Mon, we wanna go shopping!"

Ok well that's my 4th chapter. Please read and review! I thrive on knowing that others are reading this, besides myself. Next chapter will definitely be lighter, and I'm gonna move past Thanksgiving time. I hope it'll be up soon, but I'll have to see how my workload is this week. I tried my hardest not to make Mon sound like a total bitch, but I've always wanted her to tell off her mom. Also, I think that Ross needs to appreciate Monica more, so I made him. I wasn't trying to make him out to be an ass, although often times he can be on the show imo. Thanks for reading!


	5. tow the inappropriate teacher

TOW The Inappropriate Teacher 

          Ok, so this is an idea I've had for a while in my head. I just wanted to get it out now, since I've been writing. Plus I figured we could all use a break from my purely Monica/Chandler/pregnancy plots, although that really is my point here. It includes a bit more of the other characters than my other ones, imo. Well, I'll leave you to read and hopefully enjoy!

**What You Should Know: **Everything that happened in the past chapters still holds. Oh, assume that Monica and her mother made up on some level. I didn't take it any further b/c I didn't really feel it was that interesting, nor it is necessary for my later chapters. I just really wanted her to tell off her mother, and I've always had. I'm thinking that this takes place about two weeks after my last two chapters. 

**Disclaimer: **I own none of these characters. I just borrowed them.

"So did you get your invitation?" Ross asked as Monica joined Rachel, Phoebe, Ross, and Joey, who were sitting around the orange couch in Central Perk. 

"Yeah, wow, I can't believe Mr. Stevens is retiring!"

"I know!" Rachel agreed, "It feels like only yesterday when we were sitting in his American Studies class, doesn't it?"

"Yeah," Monica agreed as she stared into space, "Remember how he used to always tell us the answers to tests without actually meaning to?"

"I think I would've failed his class otherwise!" Rachel stated. 

"Yeah, he was great. Shame I don't remember a thing he taught us," Ross recalled.

"But he was the sweetest man I've ever met," Monica stated, "So are you gonna go?"

"Yeah! Why wouldn't I?" Ross asked enthusiastically, "I mean how popular will I be…I'm the father of _Rachel Green's _baby!"

"Oh, so I'm just some sort of prize to you?"

He stuttered, "nnnooo….I…I…gotta go, see ya later!" He stated as he ran out the door.  

"I can't wait to go! You gonna bring Chandler, Mon?"

"I dunno…I don't think I'm gonna go."

"What? Why not?" Rachel asked shocked. 

"I just don't want to relive past memories, okay?"

"Well, will you think about it?" Rachel begged, "For me?"

"Why? You're not going to talk to me there anyway. It'll be like old times!"

"No, no, it won't. Please?"

"I'll think about it."

"Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!" 

"So…Mon," Joey began seductively, "Wanna bring me along?" 

"No, if I'm going to bring anyone, it's going to be my husband. Since it's on a weekend, he'll be home."

"Ok fine," Joey said insulted. He then changed his tone back to seductive, "So Rach…wanna bring me…"

"Yeah right!" Rachel interrupted before he could finish. 

"Damnit," he stated and then pointed his finger at Monica and Rachel, "You Jefferson High kids are mean!"

"Joey, we didn't go to Jefferson High, we went to Lincoln High," corrected Rachel. 

"Oh right," Joey looked away, embarrassed, "I was just watching the Jeffersons, and both were presidents…" 

"Wow, you knew that Jefferson was a president?" asked Monica, shocked.

"Hey I know a couple of things!" Joey defended, "Plus it was on the back of a juice box once."

"You go Joey!" Phoebe enthused, "If they're gonna be all mean about it, then we'll just start out own elite club."

"I dunno," Joey said skeptically, "Who would be in it?"

"Well us," Phoebe began listing, "And anyone else you want to bring."

"How about some hot girls and…oooo Chandler! He's funny and I'll make him buy us beer!"

"No," Phoebe whispered harshly, "He's married to one of _them_."

"Ohhh…Well, what if they got a divorce? Then they wouldn't be married."

"That's ok, I guess."

"Hey!" Monica butted in, "We're not getting a divorce."

"Yeah, that's what you think," Phoebe whispered. Monica gave her a harsh look, but turned away. 

          "Come on Mon, you should go," Rachel whined to Monica while she was on the phone.

Monica covered up the mouthpiece and whispered harshly "Shh…can't you see I'm on the phone?" 

"Yeah, but it's only Chandler. He'll understand. Oooo…Chandler?" Rachel said as she turned on the speakerphone.

"Hey what the hell?" Monica yelled, but Rachel ignored her.

"Tell Monica you want to go to the retirement party with her!"

"What retirement party?" He asked.

Monica waved her arms at Rachel, "She didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"About the retirement party for our old teacher Mr. Stevens. We were all invited." 

"You should go Mon," He stated, "It could be fun."

"Yeah, show off that you're pregnant AND married! Unlike me." Rachel agreed.

"I don't know," Monica contemplated, "Fine, I'll go. But Chandler has to come with me."

"What? Why does Chandler have to come with?" He asked, his voice squeaky.

"Well, I am carrying _your _baby!"

Chandler relented, "How long do I have to let you use that excuse?" 

"Until you can have babies," she stated firmly. 

"So, I'll be looking forward to this retirement party," Chandler stated unenthusiastically. 

"Good, I love you."

"You should."

"Bye."

"Bye." Monica pressed the off button of the phone and looked down sadly.

"Aww," Rachel cooed, "You miss your husband, don't you?"

"Yeah," Monica looked away sadly. 

"Does someone need a hug?" Phoebe asked, as she wrapped her arms around Monica.

"Don't forget me," Rachel called out and joined in. 

 While they were hugging, Joey walked into the apartment. "Score!" he said as he looked at the three hugging girls. 

"Shut up Joey!" The three women yelled together. 

Ross looked around the school gym and said, "Wow, this place really hasn't changed."

"Yeah, Rachel paused to look around, "I can't believe that they're having his retirement party in this smelly old gym!"

"I can't believe I couldn't find a date," Ross whined.

"Well, you got to bring me!" Phoebe cheered as she grabbed a martini, "I don't have to make my separate club anymore."

"Phoebe, please don't get too drunk," Ross pleaded, "I don't need you embarrassing me."

"Well!" Phoebe said, insulted, while drowning down her martini. 

"I couldn't find a date either Ross. I mean, I had to bring Joey!" Rachel complained. 

"Hey, I'm an excellent catch!" he defended, muffled, as bits of food flew from his mouth, "Sorry."

Rachel rolled her eyes and then pointed to the left, "Look Mon, It's that bitch Nancy Branson!" 

"Great, and the fun begins" Monica said sarcastically, as Rachel grabbed her arm and dragged her around the gym. 

          Chandler sat at the table, with boredom written plainly on his face. Joey approached him and said, "Dude, there are some _hot _chicks here! Shame you can't get any."

"I wouldn't be able to get them anyway, even if I was single."

"True," Joey agreed as he left Chandler sitting alone. Next Phoebe came up to him, in a complete drunken state. "Hey Chhhhndler" she began, "What kind of name is Chhhhhndler?"

"It's Chandler, for one thing," he corrected, "You know what? Never mind."

She slowly wobbled away, as Chandler looked away, pretending not to know her. 

"So, bored?" Monica asked as she sat down next to Chandler.

"No, not at all," he replied sarcastically. 

"I'm _so _bored, too!" she complained.

"Really?"

"Yeah, these people are stuck up. I hated them in high school, and I still do."

"Well Rachel seems to be enjoying herself," he said as he turned to look at her surrounded by a group of ten people. 

"My point exactly. The stuck up people." Monica explained, "She she's not like that when she's around us. They bring it out of her."

"I see."

"I'm gonna give it another half an hour before we go."

"Good, and by half an hour you don't happen to mean two minutes?"

An overweight man walked up to Monica. "Why if it isn't Monica Geller? Aren't you one sexy woman!" 

"Shut up, Jason," She said as he walked away, dejected. "People keep doing that to me!" Monica complained, "It's so annoying."

"Yeah, I'm sure it's annoying to be hot," Chandler quipped. 

Monica ignored his statement. "Oh, it's Mr. Stevens!" Monica enthused, as she caught his attention.

"Why hello miss," he said while looking Monica over, "And who might this pretty lady be?"

"She might be my wife!" Chandler answered. 

Monica patted Chandler's arm, and then said to Mr. Stevens, "It's me, Monica Geller. Well, Bing, now."

"Wow, you look a lot sexier now! If you looked like that 15 years ago, I would've done you in my closet!" he stated, extremely drunk.

"Hey, don't talk to my wife like that!" Chandler yelled. 

"It's my night, don't talk to _me _like that!"

"If you weren't so old, I would pound you," Chandler said under his breath.

Incredibly insulted by Mr. Stevens behavior Monica tugged Chandler, "Let's go…now!" 

          Once they returned home, Monica sighed as she kicked off her shoes and sat down on their bed. "I _knew _it was a bad idea to go tonight."

"Hey, I'm sorry."

"Nah, it's okay. High school really sucked, but my life after it wasn't so bad."

"How bout now?" 

Monica kissed him on the nose, "It's perfect."

"Good, because I feel the exact same way."

They began to kiss patiently and Chandler laid Monica down on the bed and got on top of her. (And I'll leave it like that b/c I'm under-aged and this fic is PG.)

          Later that night, Phoebe stumbled into Monica and Chandler's apartment, still drunk from her excessive intake of alcohol. While walking in the darkness of the living room, she fell over the sofa. 

"Who's there?" Chandler yelled as he grabbed a book and ran out of his bedroom in his robe. 

"It's me, Phoebe! You're gonna hit me with a book? You know if I were a robber or murderer, I'd have you unconscious or dead at this very moment." Phoebe continued teasingly, "Oh and your robe is open…I can see _your thing_!" Chandler walked back into his room, extremely embarrassed. 

"Uh-huh," Phoebe smiled as she fell back on their sofa. 

Ok, well there was my 5th chapter. Wow, I'm surprised I made it this far. I wasn't planning on writing another one today, but I did. I'm hoping I'll have time to write during the week, in between my homework, but we'll see. Ok please read and review! Thanks :) 


	6. tow the hidden fears

TOW The Hidden Fears

       I'm back for my 6th chapter. I was going to wait to see if I would get more reviews, since I just recently posted chapter 5, but to my luck, I'm home sick. I hate having to miss school, when there actually is school, that is. I mean vacation days are wonderful. However, when I miss for sickness, there's so much work to make up! It really sucks. I should probably be resting, but every time I lay down, I feel worse, so I'm not. Ok well enough about me being sick. I hope you enjoy this next chapter. Please read and review!

**What You Should Know: **Yet again, everything holds from the other chapters. This takes place like a week after my last one. The time span I'm using is probably not very accurate for real life, but hey, that's the beauty of fiction!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own any of these characters; you know how it goes.

 Resent 

Chandler woke up from his sleep and looked around. He noticed the clock saying 5:30 AM and that Monica wasn't in bed. He got up, groggily, and went into the living room. 

"Mon?" he called, searching for her. He then looked at the closed bathroom door and realized that she was inside. Hearing her gagging, he slowly opened up the door, wordlessly walked in, and held back her hair as she threw up. 

"Chandler…" Monica began, but was cut off by another wave of sickness. Once she felt slightly better, she got up to brush her teeth and then turned to Chandler, "You really didn't have to stay."

"I know, but I wanted to."

"You wanted to watch me throw up?"

"No, not that. Believe me. But, I feel like…I'm the father, so all I really have to do is donate my 'contribution to the cause' and then my part's…well over until the baby's born. It's not fair that you should have to go through all this, while I feel perfectly normal. If you're going to be up puking, then I'll be there, too." She smiled at him, and then he continued, "Plus, I owe it to you, since you watched me throw up when I ate that green stuff that Joey made."

"Yeah. And unfortunately, I had to watch Joey throw up, too."

       Later that day, Joey entered Monica and Chandler's apartment, sat down at the table, and grabbed some leftover lasagna from the refrigerator. 

"Joey!" Monica yelled as she exited from her bedroom, "Don't eat out of dish, damnit! Why do you always have to do that?!"

Joey was hurt by Monica's lose of temper, and then at her refusal to apologize. Chandler, who had been watching the scene unfold from the living room, tried gently, "Mon, he didn't mean anything by it. I'm sure he'll use a plate next time."

"Ohhhh," Monica remarked sarcastically, "Mr. Calm and Collected is here. Trying to 'keep his wife in order', huh? Well, why don't you have a baby inside of you, and then tell me 'he didn't mean anything by it.'"

"I'm really sorry Mon," Joey said, frightened by her outburst.

"Yeah, well, save it. I'm going to sleep." With that, she walked out of the room.

       "Hey Chandler," Rachel greeted the next day, as he picked up his cup of coffee and sat next to her on the orange couch in Central Perk. 

"Hi, what's up?"

"Nothing. Oh, I've been meaning to ask you, what's up with Monica?"

'What do you mean?"

"Well, she's been acting really distant lately. Plus, when I can over to borrow some sugar, she almost bit off my head telling me I should knock first."

"I agree," Ross, who was sitting on the other side of Rachel, added.

"Yeah, so do I. I seriously have no idea. I can't even ask her because whenever I try, she's either sleeping or blaming it on 'hormones.'"

"Maybe it really is hormones," Ross pointed out.

"No, I don't think so. I mean, it could be, but neither Rachel nor Phoebe acted like she is now. I mean, one minute they were miserable, one minute they were sad, the next happy…"

Rachel cut Chandler off, "Yeah, ok, I know, I was there!" 

"Right," Chandler agreed, sheepishly, "But with Monica, she's been consistently angry."

"So, she's been acting that way all the time?" Ross questioned.

"Yeah, pretty much." Chandler added sadly, "I don't know what to do. This pregnancy and me being in Tulsa has made things really hard."

Rachel's eyes lit up at her revelation, "Maybe that's why she's so upset!"

"What?" Ross asked, confused. 

"Because I've been away," Chandler explained, upset that he was the cause of Monica's pain. "I hate this!" 

"Hate what?"

"Being away from her and being the cause of her pain. I just feel so conflicted!"

"How so?" Rachel asked, concerned.

"Either way I become a bad father and terrible husband," he thought aloud. 

Ross and Rachel looked at him, puzzled, so Ross asked, "What are you talking about?"

"Look…if I continue to live mostly in Tulsa, I abandon my family, but make a good living for them. But if I live in New York, I stay with my family, but don't make enough money for them because I'd lose my job!" The overwhelming emotions of guilt got to him, as ran his fingers through his hair, "Either way, I'm going to ruin everything."

"No, that's not true!" Rachel assured him.

"Yeah, Mon knows that being in Tulsa is something that you have to do. Plus, it's only a temporary thing. Hopefully, by the time your kid is born, you'll be back in New York."

"Yeah, well I can't live on hope. I've been trying my hardest to get my job in New York back, but the only way I can do that is if I find a suitable replacement for my job in Tulsa."

"And you haven't been able to?"

"No! They shoot down everyone I bring to them."

"Well," Rachel started, "Maybe next time, you shouldn't fall asleep in a meeting."

"Thanks," he said sarcastically as he got up to leave, "I'll try to figure out something."

       Later that week, Monica was in her living room, watching television, with the lights out. It was around midnight, but Monica was having trouble sleeping. Suddenly, she heard a key go into her lock and saw the doorknob twist, so she docked under the sofa, in fear of who was entering her apartment at such a late hour. When the man walked in, he looked around, being careful not trip over anything. 

Monica poked her head up surprised, "Chandler?"

Chandler jumped and tripped over one of the kitchen chairs. "Oh my god Monica, you scare the crap out of me!" Getting up from the floor he asked, "W..w..what are you doing up? I didn't see you."

"What are you doing home?" 

"Don't answer a question with a question," noticing that she looked anything, but pleased with his comment, he continued, "I have a surprise for you."

"Yeah?" she asked, not very interested. 

Her lack of enthusiasm was unsettling to him, but he continued despite that, "I got my job back in New York!"

"Really?" Monica asked, not believing what he was saying. 

"Really."

She smiled slightly and hugged him, and then added, "Well, I'm gonna go to sleep," she said, as she made her way to their bedroom.

Chandler sighed, "Your still upset. I thought that was why you were upset, but I guess not." He begged her retreating figure, "Please talk to me."

Monica, noticing the concern in Chandler's voice, turned to face him. "I've been a real bitch lately, haven't I?"

Chandler looked at her for a second and said, "I don't think I should answer that."

"I have been."

"Well, you did yell at Ross because his hair was bothering you."

Monica looked down at her feet, ashamed at her behavior.

"Tell me why you've been acting like this? This isn't the Monica I know."

"I know, I know," she answered, holding back tears, "It's just, I'm just…I'm gonna go to sleep."

"No, please don't!" Chandler begged as Monica began to close up again, "I'm your husband. You can tell me anything. Is it me? Do you want me to leave?"

"No, no, of course not," she answered hastily. 

"Then what is it?"

Monica paused for a few moments, staring into Chandler's blue eyes, which were full of concern and affection. Finally, in a low whisper she admitted, "I'm scared."

"Scared of what?"

"Of messing up; of hurting our child. I'm scared, no terrified, that our baby will grow up to resent me, like I resent my mother!"

"I had no idea you felt this way. I wish you would've told me." 

"I know."

"If it helps at all, things are going better between you and your mother, now that you had that 'incident'."

"I know, but I don't want to have to wait that long before my child can love me."

"You know, your nothing like your mother. You're caring and compassionate. I've seen you with Ben, and it's amazing how much he loves his aunt. Oh and Emma-was it not _you_ who was the only one able to stop her from crying? Children love you because you're such a kind and gentle person. Believe me, you are the total opposite of your mother."

A small smile made its way onto Monica's lips, and at the sight of her smile, Chandler let out a sigh of relief. 

"You wanna know something?" he asked gently.

"What?"

"I've been having the same feelings as you."

"Really?" Monica asked shocked.

"Yeah, well I tried to talk to you, but you were always…too tired."

Monica looked away, and Chandler continued to talk, "I'm just glad you opened up to me. It's scary to not know what's bothering the woman you love."

Monica moved towards where Chandler was sitting on the sofa, and snuggled next to him as he wrapped an arm around her. 

"Thanks,"

"No problem. Believe it or not, once in a while, I am useful for something other than sarcastic comments and sex, babe."

Monica hit him on the shoulder and then agreed, "Well you are _very good _at both those things."

Chandler answered, "So I've heard." 

Ok that's my 6th chapter. Hope you enjoyed reading it. Please leave a review. Chapter 7 should be up shortly. :) 


	7. tow the big bing baby surprise

TOW The Big Bing Baby Surprise

          I'm back for chapter 7, I think, of my series. I'm beginning to lose count! I hope it's not really annoying for anybody that my fics are sappy, but that's how I am. I feel that, on the show, they show very little to make one believe that any of the Friends care deeply about each other, especially Monica. I think that Chandler shows the most towards Monica, and she kinda doesn't do anything. Not that I think that's a bad thing; It's a comedy. It shouldn't be sappy. I just like to write how I would like things to go, if it were sappy. Enough said--I hope you enjoy this chapter.

**What You Should Know: **Yet again, everything still stands. To brief you (since 7's my lucky #) Mon and Chandler are pregnant, and Chandler no longer lives in Tulsa. (Yay, I wish they'd do that one the show, too. He belongs in NY w/ his Friends and wife!) ****

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing and no one; not even myself. You see, I sold my soul, like Bart Simpson did. (Any Simpson watchers out there?) Well ok, I never sold my soul, but my parents pretty much "own me" till I'm 18 anyway. Oh and I'm not really as strange as I sound in these…it's just weird since I'm kinda talking to myself here, in a way. 

"I'm so happy your home for good!" Joey cheered as he hugged Chandler tight in the middle of Chandler and Monica's apartment. 

"Joey, you're crushing my ribs!" Chandler said breathlessly.

Joey let go of him and patted him on the back, "Sorry man."

"This is so great," Rachel admitted, "I missed always being the six of us." 

"Yeah," Ross agreed, "It was like something was always missing when you were gone."

"Really?" Chandler asked, touched.

"No, but I figured it was the right thing to say." Ross joked.

"Thanks man," Chandler said sarcastically. 

Phoebe entered the apartment and asked, "What's the big announcement?" 

"Well, you took a little while to get here," Monica looked away guilty, "So everyone else already knows…"

"What?!" Phoebe questioned, insulted. 

"We're so sorry Pheebs, but hey, we can tell you now." Chandler tried.

"Ok, that'll just have to do," Phoebe said bitterly, but added enthusiastically, "Can I guess?"

"Fine," Monica replied, "But keep in mind, neither of us are dying, nor did either of us cheat on each other."

"Oh, well then, never mind."

Monica and Chandler shared a look, and then Chandler gestured for Monica to tell Phoebe their news, "Chandler's moving back home!" 

Phoebe looked at them for a moment, "_That_ was the important news? Sheesh, I rushed for no reason at all." Monica and Chandler shared yet another look.

"Anyway," Ross said trying to break the tension Phoebe had given off, "Mon, when's your doctors appointment?"

"In a few hours."

"Is Chandler coming with?" Rachel asked Monica.

"I don't know, why don't you ask him," she said as she pointed to Chandler sitting beside her.

"Well, I just figured to ask you, since you normally answer for him anyway."

"I do not."

"Do too."

"Do not."

"Do too."

"Stop it!" Phoebe yelled at the bickering friends, "Is this how a mother and soon-to-be mother should be acting?"

Both Rachel and Monica looked away from Phoebe, ashamed. 

Suddenly Monica turned to Chandler and stated, "I don't answer for you all the time."

"Umm…hmm…oh look at the time!" Chandler bluffed as he walked towards the door, "I'll be back in an hour." With that he rushed out of the apartment. 

Rachel turned to watch Chandler exit, and then turned back towards Monica, "Do too."

"Oh, what the hell do you know?" Monica asked bitterly as she got up to get a broom. 

          "Chandler quit fidgeting," Monica scolded as they were waiting in the OB-GYN office. 

"Sorry, it's just, this place creeps me out. I mean, look at these things," he pointed towards the assorted tools on the tray next to the table which Monica was laying on, "And you know where those go…"

"Yes, thank you. I know much better than you do. Besides, you do your own part in sticking things in…"

"Okay," Chandler said uncomfortably, "Changing subjects."

Just then, the doctor walked into the room, and Chandler tensed up. 

"So," the doctor started, "I take it this is Mr. Bing," she said gesturing towards Chandler. 

"Yeah," Monica agreed, "He's very nervous," Then Monica whispered to the doctor, "It's his first time." 

Chandler looked at Monica with wide eyes, but she just smirked at him. 

"We have fathers like him in here everyday," she said as she began to go through her computer and ask a series of questions. 

"Any vomiting?" the doctor asked.

"Yes," Monica answered, "But it's been a bit better lately."

"I could vomit right now," Chandler added as he squirmed in his seat. 

"Grow up!" Monica scolded, as Chandler put his hand over his mouth. 

Chandler looked away as the doctor began to examine Monica. Then he slowly turned around when he heart a heartbeat. 

"Is…is that the baby?" Chandler asked nervously.

"Yes it is, Mr. Bing. And you can see it on that screen over there," said the doctor as she pointed at the screen. 

Chandler went over to Monica, who was crying, and held her hand to his heart, "Wow," he breathed and Monica nodded in agreement. 

          "What's wrong?" Monica panicked as she looked at the doctor who was examining the picture and heartbeat closely. 

"Nothing's wrong, don't worry," the doctor replied hastily.

"But you look like you're awfully concerned over nothing," Chandler said in horror, "What's wrong?"

"Please, if you could just hold on for one moment," the doctor asked, frustrated with the couple. 

"Hmm…" the doctor said after a few moments.

"Hmm?" Chandler mimicked, "Hmm, as in, 'hmm…your baby has three heads or hmm…your baby is an alien or…"

"Shut up Chandler!" Monica exclaimed. 

"Sorry," he said abruptly. 

"No, Mr. Bing, it's nothing like that at all," she smiled, "You're having twins."

Monica gasped, "Oh my God," she cried happily, the tears running down her face even more than before. 

"Listen," the doctor told them, "Do you hear the two heartbeats?" 

Monica was past being able to speak, and she just nodded. Chandler, on the other hand, stood rooted in his spot, shocked. 

After noticing that Chandler wasn't moving, Monica made an attempt to speak to him, "Chandler?" After receiving no reply, she hit him. 

He turned towards her and stuttered, "T…t…twins? T…two babies?"

"That's what twins mean," Monica answered the obvious. 

"But…but we don't even have one baby yet," Chandler squeaked, "How can we have two!?" Monica just shook her head and got dressed. 

          "He hasn't said a single word since he found out we were having twins. I think he's still in shock." Monica complained as she ended her story of her appointment. 

"Typical Chandler response," Rachel answered as she sipped her coffee.

"No!" Monica argued, "That's typical old Chandler response, not the Chandler that's my husband!"

"Well," Phoebe began, "He did almost leave you on your wedding day."

"Yeah, Phoebe's right," Rachel agreed.

"You're right!" Then she began to panic, "What if you guys are right? What if he runs away and abandons me!" 

"Wouldn't surprise me," Phoebe answered nonchalantly, while flipping through a magazine. 

Monica sat back against the orange sofa and bit her lip, willing herself not to cry again. 

          That night, Monica watched Chandler while he slept. She was too scared to sleep; he might run away. "I'm gonna watch you like a hawk," she mumbled to Chandler's sleeping form, "You are not getting away from me." Unfortunately, Monica was extremely tired and unable to keep her eyes open for longer than an hour. Slowly she allowed herself to lay back and fall asleep, clutching her stomach protectively as she slumbered. 

          She woke up early the next morning and realized Chandler wasn't next to her. She panicked and ran out the bedroom door, wondering where he went. She looked around the apartment and didn't see Chandler anywhere. Then, she noticed that the light was on over their balcony outside. There sat Chandler, wrapped in a blanket, stooping over his laptop. Monica made some coffee for him and then went through the window leading to the terrace. 

          "Hey, you should be careful going through that window!" Chandler reprimanded as he took the coffee mug from her hand in order to keep her spilling it all over herself. 

She smiled to herself, knowing that he was still concerned about her, "What are you doing?" she asked as she sat down on the chair next to his. 

"Just looking through our finances. I wanted to see how different things would be with, ya know, two babies instead of one." 

"Right," Monica sat quiet for a minute, but then gained the courage to speak up, "Are you upset that we're having twins?"

"No, just shocked and feeling a bit…unprepared." 

"Yeah, me too."

"We'll make it together. I mean, if Frank and Alice could handler three babies, than I'm sure we can handle two."

"Yeah," Monica agreed softly and then turned to him, "Didn't you say, before we got married, that you wanted twins?"

"Yeah! But that was, ya know, after I had one kid. I mean, come on, you don't learn the basics of driving by getting on the highway!"

"Speak for yourself," off chandler's look she explained, "I was a fast learner." 

"Well good, because you'll probably have to help me out, _a lot_."

"I know. And you'll have to help me, too. We're married now; we're a team. We're in everything together, not alone."

"Right," he agreed, "I'm beginning to forget all those things I read in those marriage books you forced me to study."

"Well maybe you should study them again." She replied smugly.

Imitating her smugness he shot back, "Maybe I should study baby books first."

"Yeah, me too. Hey we can study together! I can make up tests and quizzes for us…" after noticing that Chandler was less than thrilled with her offer she added quickly, "Or not."

Ok, there's chapter 7. Hope people still like this series. I'm crossing my fingers here. Please read and review!:) Oh and thanks for the get-well wishes. I am feeling better, probably going back to school tomorrow—yay! (not) 


	8. tow chandler babysits

Hi again, I'm back to working on this series now. At the moment I should be doing my hw, but I kinda gave up when I realized I had no idea how to do my math homework. They shouldn't have let me into honors, ill tell ya that. Actually, it's not my fault. (of course I'd say that…) My teacher gives terrible notes. I mean, the stuff is easy…functions and domains, etc. (for any of u people who take/have taken Algebra II), I just don't know how to do it. I'm also really tired, so if I start making absolutely no sense, you'll know why. I hate how towards the end of the week you get more tired, and seem to have more tests. Does that happen to anyone else? Enough of my rambling; am I the only one who does that? Here's the next chapter. Hope you enjoy it. 

**What You Should Know: **Everything stands from the previous chapters. If you haven't read them, then I strongly suggest it. 

**Disclaimer: **I don't own the characters, nor do I ever intend to. 

          "Monica, Chandler?" Rachel asked as she approached the orange couch that they were sitting on in Central Perk, " Could you watch Emma for us tonight? Ross has some 'dinosaur thing' or something, as usual, and I have this meeting to go to."

"Sure!" Monica enthused, "Right Chandler?"

"Right," Chandler added, less enthusiastically.

"Hey, you need the practice," Monica scolded.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah."

"Great!" Rachel praised, "Thank you _so _much. You know, I just don't feel right about leaving Emma with a babysitter yet and…"

"You don't want to pay," Monica finished Rachel's sentence.

"Well, I wasn't gonna say that, but…yeah."

"Hey!' Chandler complained, "How come we don't get paid for watching your kid?"

"Because you're her aunt and uncle," Rachel pointed out, "Besides, you really do need the practice."

"I'm not blood related. And how much did _you _practice before Emma was born?"

"Oh look at the time!" Rachel said while looking at her watch, ignoring Chandler's question; "Gotta get to work!" With that, Rachel ran out of the coffee shop. 

          That afternoon, Rachel came over to Chandler and Monica's with Emma and two big bags. "So," Rachel asked, noticing that only Chandler was there, "Where's Monica?" 

"Still at work. She'll be here soon." Chandler assured her. 

"Ok, you sure you're up to the challenge?"

"If you can do it," Chandler joked, "then I know I can."

"Ha, ha, ha," she mocked as she handed him Emma and dropped the two bags. 

Noticing the bags Chandler quipped, "Is she gonna be living here now?"

"What?"

"That's an awful lot of stuff for a baby. I'm sure she doesn't even appreciate half this stuff," Chandler said, while rummaging through her bag of toys, "Just give her a pacifier, a clean diaper, a bottle, and something shinny, and she's set for the next year or so."

"Very funny," Rachel answered, "I bet Monica will be twice as bad, considering she's having two babies." 

Chandler looked at her funny, "_No one _buys as much stuff as you do, not even Monica."

"Right, sure," she answered unconvinced, then changing topics she said, "Ok, let's get this show on the road. In this bag," Rachel explained as she lifted a big red bag, "are her bottles, pacifiers, diapers, formula, etc. And in the other bag, are the toys, which it seems you have already discovered," she pointed out, while Chandler was playing with her stuffed bunny. "Are you even listening?"

"Uh-huh," he said distractedly.

"Chandler!" 

"What, oh yeah…great." 

"You'd better not hurt my child, or I will kill you!" Rachel threatened as she left the apartment. 

"Wow, Emma, you're mommy's scary," in a lower tone he added, "I feel sorry for you." 

          After Rachel left, Chandler did his best to stop Emma's incessant cries, although his attempts proved to be unsuccessful. "Look Emma, it's your old pal Big Bird," he said, holding up the yellow bird. Instead, she began to cry even harder. "Oh my God, I'm gonna be a terrible father!" he said as he threw down the stuffed animal. "What's wrong with you? Are you hungry?" he asked, while holding a bottle to her. However, she refused it, and he went on. "Diaper need changing?" he asked while he smelled her bottom, "Nope, not yet, thank God. You wait till your Aunt Monica gets here for that." After that, the phone rang and Chandler ran to pick it up. 

"Hey Chandler," Monica said over the phone, "I'm gonna have to work late tonight. There was this problem with the stoves, and someone got burnt and then things took a turn for the worst. Do you think you can handle Emma?"

"Of course I can handle Emma, don't you hear her _screaming for joy_ to be here?!" Chandler asked sarcastically. 

"Come on Chandler, don't do this to me. It's not my fault!" Monica said angrily, "Besides, it's good practice." 

"Fine," Chandler huffed, "Bye!" Then he hung up the phone. "So Emms, it's just you and me." After he said that Emma's cries became noticeably louder.

          "Oh please stop crying!" Chandler begged after being with her for an hour. He began pacing the room frantically, constantly running his fingers through his hair. "I'll call someone. That's right!" He picked up the phone, dialed a number, and then after waiting for a minute began to talk, "Hey Phoebe, it's Chandler. I'm babysitting Emma alone, and she won't stop crying, and I don't know what to do. You need to help me, where are you?!" he said frantically into the phone. Then he hung up, and began pacing nervously again. "Joey, I'll call Joey!" he picked up the phone and begin dialing, but then hung up, "What am I thinking?! Joey can't take care of himself, let alone a baby!" Ok Emms, how about a walk?" He asked as he picked her up. Suddenly she stopped crying. "W…w…what happened?" he questioned; "Oh my God, Emma, are you dead?" he panicked as he looked into her face. However, he saw her blinking and felt her moving around, and sighed in relief. "You just wanted to be held," he cooed. "God, I'm an idiot."

          "Look Emma," he pointed to a couple as they walked through Central Park, "That guy is gonna get dumped soon. Believe me, I know that look the woman's wearing. Rejection is no cup of tea, I'll tell ya that." Chandler explained while pushing her in the stroller, "I've been rejected a lot. But don't you worry, I'm sure you'll be the one breaking all the hearts, sweetie." He began to tickle her and she giggled slightly. Chandler smiled broadly, "Ya know what Emms, I'm really enjoying this. I can't wait to be a father now!" 

          When they stopped, Chandler realized he had to change Emma's diaper. "Ok Emma, let's make this as painless as possible, ok?" With that, he laid her down on a mat and took off her dirty diaper. "Yuch!" he complained as he balled the diaper up, careful not to touch the inside, "I'm glad I won't have to change my children _all _their lives." He wiped her, dried her, and dressed her back up in her clothes. He then picked her and made a silly face, again soliciting a laugh from Emma. 

While he was doing that, a middle aged woman, who had been watching the scene, approached Chandler. "I know it's none of my business, but you make a _very _good father!"

"Yeah?" Chandler questioned, surprised.

"Yes. The baby just seems to love you so much!"

"Well thanks. Actually, she's not my child. She's my niece."

"Really?" the woman asked, astonished, "I would've never known. She's really adorable."

"Yeah, I know. My brother-in-law's a lucky guy."

"Well, whenever you become a father, you'd be a great one."

"Thanks," Chandler smiled again, "Actually, my wife's pregnant with twins." 

"Well, congratulations!" 

          Once it started to get really dark and cold, Chandler decided to take Emma back to the apartment. When he opened the door, he saw everyone in his apartment, the apprehension within the group very obvious. 

"Oh my God!" Rachel screamed, panicked, "Where were you?!" 

Chandler replied causally, "Emma and I just went for a stroll in Central Park." 

"A stroll?" Ross asked angrily, "Remember when you took Ben for 'a stroll'? You ended up losing him!"

"Hey!" Chandler said, offended, "That was like 7 years ago now, and I was with _Joey_! I'm more responsible then that now."

"Yeah, well you don't just take a person's baby for a 'stroll in Central Park without telling them!"

"Well, I do believe it was the two of you who entrusted me with her for the day. Besides, look, she's fine!" he said, pointed towards Emma, gurgling in her mother's arms. 

"Still, that's not the point."

"What? She wanted some fresh air. She didn't cry the entire time. And I fed her, changed her diaper, made her laugh, all those things." 

"What? How did you make her laugh?" Ross asked, "Did you make a sarcastic remark to her?"

"No! Look, I'll make her laugh again!" Chandler challenged as he made a bunch of funny faces at her. After a minute, Emma really did begin to giggle.

Phoebe gasped, "It's like the world's been turned upside down! Chandler can finally handle a responsibility!"

"See!" Chandler gloated to a shocked Ross and Rachel.

"Oh God, she's gonna be attached to them!" Rachel worried as she gestured towards Monica and Chandler. "I mean, Monica makes her stop crying magically, and now Chandler makes her laugh! She's gonna hate me and love them!" 

"That's not true," Monica defended. "You know, your daughter can't depend on you for every little thing her life all the time. You're just going to have to…accept that fact, and let it be." 

"Yeah right," Joey laughed, "Like you'd be able to do that, Mon!"

"Hey, I could so do that!"

"Ok then," Joey suggested, "Why don't you give _me_ one of your babies." 

"What?!" Monica asked angrily, "Why in the world would I give _you _one of _my _children."

"See, she can't do it!" 

"That's not the same thing Joey," Chandler said to him. 

"Aww come on!" Joey complained, "I want a baby, too. It's not fair! You guys get two babies, and I get none!"

"If you want a baby so badly," Phoebe suggested, "Then why don't you look for a serious relationship where you may, some day, move towards having a baby."

"Only date _one woman?_ I don't think so!" Joey stated. 

"Whatever, Joey." 

"You know, I really have to say I'm pleasantly surprised, Chandler. I never thought you could handle a child so well on your own." Rachel complimented.

"Me neither," Monica snorted and then covered her mouth, "I didn't mean that!"

"WHAT?!" Chandler yelled, "How could you, of all people, think that?"

"Oooh, finally, some action," Phoebe stated as she watched the bickering couple.

"I'm sorry," Monica apologized as she attempted to rub his arm, but he moved away from her reach, "It's not that I didn't think you would become a terrific father; it's that…I didn't think it would happen so soon."

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Well, I thought that, once our babies come, you would automatically get this paternal instinct, like a lot of fathers do. I had just, never actually seen you with a baby, since, well the triplets. And that was when you got that little toy gun stuck in your throat. That didn't give me a very good impression of your parenting abilities back then."

"To tell you the truth, it didn't give me a good impression of my parenting skills either."  
"Me neither," Phoebe agreed.

"Yeah same here," Rachel concurred as Ross nodded along with them.

"I agree," Joey said.

"You're one to talk," Chandler defended, "You're the one who cried when your nephew played with your stuffed penguin!"

"Hey!" Joey defended, "He was hurting Hugsy!" 

"Joey, you _do _know that Hugsy isn't real?" Monica asked.

After hesitating for a moment, Joey answered, "Yes, I know _that!_" 

Chandler asked, "You know it like, you actually understand? Or you know like that time you thought that you could make a puppet, like Pinocchio, that would become a real boy?"

Joey thought for a second then said, "I would prefer not to answer to that."  

Ok there ya go, chapter 8 is done. I swear I wrote most of this before tonight's epi of Friends! And had the idea forever, too. I really didn't mean to have the same sort of plot a bit. I hope it's not too similar for u. Ok, well before I fall asleep right here, please read and review! I hope you liked the chapter. :)


	9. tow rachel won't leave

TOW Rachel Won't Leave

Ok Chapter 9 is up! I hope you enjoy it. I'm beginning to wonder if this series is worth continuing. I haven't been getting many reviews lately. I think that I really need the reassurance, so please review! Ok, well, I really hope you like it. 

**What You Should Know: **Although I don't mention it, I'm thinking that Monica is about 4-5 months pregnant now. Just so you know. Think more along the lines of 5 though, I think. Uhh…Chandler lives in NY all the time, and not cheering for that city near Tulsa. (What the hell _was_ that?) This fic is not very Monica and Chandler centered, although it deals with both of them. Has a lot more Rachel than I normally have. Hell, it actually has some Ross! I've like, never included him. It's an idea I thought up during Chemistry yesterday, leading to much bigger events that should come out in the next fic.  

**Disclaimer: **I don't own these characters, blah, blah, blah. 

          "Uch, he's just, just," Rachel stuttered, thinking of the right words, "So annoying! I can't stand living with him sometimes!"

"I know Rach," Monica consoled, "I had to live with him for like 16 years."

"Yeah, and I had to live with him for four," Chandler added, "And we didn't have separate bedrooms!" 

"Between him being annoying and Emma crying, I wanna kill myself sometimes." 

"Well, don't do anything that stupid, but if you wanna kill Ross, that would be okay with me," Monica joked. She then yawned and got up from the sofa, "I'm sorry Rach, but I'm exhausted."

"Well I'll stay here and talk to Chandler!"

Chandler's eyes widened, thinking of an excuse, "But I have an early meeting tomorrow, so I really should get to sleep, too."

"You don't have an early meeting!" Rachel called his bluff.

"Yeah, well anything's better than listening to you complain."

"Hey!" Rachel yelled, insulted, but then softened, "Yeah, you're right."

"Sorry Rach, I would listen, but I really am exhausted," Monica assured.

"Ok guys, I'm just gonna use your bathroom and I'll leave," Rachel said bitterly.

"Ok 'night." Monica replied as she and Chandler went into their bedroom. 

          Early that morning, Monica stumbled out her room, heading towards the bathroom. 

"Ah!" she screamed, seeing someone walking towards her.

"Hey Mon," Rachel greeted.

"Oh my God Rachel, you scared the hell out of me!" Monica scolded, "What are you doing here? It's like 5 am!" 

"Ross and I got into this huge fight and I told him I wasn't coming home for the night, and I thought…where else should I stay, but at my best friend's place?"

"Great…" Monica said less enthusiastically. 

"I know, isn't it?!"

"That's what I said," Monica replied sarcastically, "So, for about how long do you plan on staying here?"

"Like till tonight."

"Ok," Monica relented, "That's fine."

"Great!"

Monica went used the bathroom, then went back to sleep, while Rachel laid down on the sofa. 

          At 9 AM, Chandler left his room and entered the kitchen, where Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe were seated. 

"Good morning roomie!" Rachel said excitedly.

"Excuse me?" Chandler asked, confused.

"I'm staying here for a little," Rachel said then paused, "Didn't Monica tell you?"

"When did you two decide this?" 

"This morning, at five."

"Yeah, well I haven't spoken to my wife since 10:00 last night."

"Well then, I'm telling you!" 

"Wow, good luck with that man," Joey whispered.

"What?" Chandler asked, reciprocating his whisper, "You lived with her for a while, and didn't hate it."

"I know, but she's gotten really weird ever since that baby came. I don't think I would live with her again."

"Thanks," Chandler replied sarcastically.

Just then, Monica exited from their bedroom. "Hey guys!"

Immediately, Chandler pulled Monica back into their room. 

"Hey Mon," Chandler began with mock cheerfulness. 

"Yeah?"

"I didn't know we discussed allowing _Rachel _to live with us."

"We didn't, and she's not. It's only till tonight."

"Oh, well she made it sound like she was staying much longer than that."

"How?"

"Well she called me 'roomie' for one!"

"Uh-oh."

"What?"

"Rachel's in one of those 'moods' she gets into."

Chandler gasped, "So?"

"So," Monica emphasized, "She's not going to us leave until something better comes along!"

"What if we lure her out with a mall?" Chandler quipped.  

"It would have to be a mall that would never close!" 

"So, looks like Rachel's living with us!" Chandler said unhappily. 

Monica rolled her eyes and pulled Chandler back into the kitchen. 

          "So what do we do?" Chandler asked Phoebe and Joey in Joey's apartment.

"And she hasn't even mentioned leaving?"

"No! She's been in our house for three days and I want to cut off my ears!"

"Yeah," Monica agreed, "It's like she's the 'all complaining all the time network'." 

"With no commercials!" Chandler added angrily. 

"I told you she's gotten worse," Joey bragged, "Monica lived with her for longer than me!"

"Yeah, well there were plenty of times when I wanted to cut my ears off, too, when she was my roommate." 

"Me too!" Phoebe agreed, "She doesn't shut up about things." 

"Plus," Monica added, "She's even brought Emma over for the nights. Rachel does _not _know how to shut that baby up!"

"What should we do?" Chandler asked again. 

Joey's eyes widened as he snapped his fingers. "I have an idea!" 

"So, the light bulb's not broken then?" Chandler quipped.

"What light bulb?" Phoebe asked, confused. 

"You know, the light bulb that goes off when cartoon characters have an idea."

"Joey's not a cartoon character."

"I know, but…never mind!" Chandler said frustrated.

"I got it sweetie," Monica consoled, "Very funny."

"Uch, you're my wife—you have to say that!"

"Yeah, I do." 

"Ok anyway," Joey interrupted, "Do you want my idea before I forget it or not?"

"Yeah, go ahead." Monica encouraged. 

"Ok, so you get Rachel and Ross to stop fighting, so that she'll go back to the apartment."

"Joey! That's brilliant!" Monica complimented. 

"Yup, the bulb really is working!" Chandler added. 

"What?" Phoebe asked.

"Don't get that started again!" Monica warned. 

"So, how are we gonna do it?" Chandler asked.

"I know!" Monica gloated as she wrote down her ideas.

"Wow," Phoebe commented, "You write like a billion words a minute."  
"I know!" Monica said excitedly. 

 After a moment, Monica handed Chandler her list. "It's just a ruff draft, I mean I thought of it all in less than two minutes."

"Uh, Mon?" Chandler asked while looking down at the paper. 

"Yeah?"

"I don't think that killing Ross would be a good idea."

"It was just a brainstorm!" 

"Ok, I'm gonna move over there," Chandler said pointing to the living room. 

Phoebe stole the list from Chandler's hands. "How about getting them to talk about Emma?"

"That'll work!" Chandler agreed.

"So how do we get them into the same room?" Monica asked.

"Leave that to me," Phoebe insisted. 

          That afternoon, Phoebe went over to Monica and Chandler's and sat down next to Rachel on the sofa, "Wanna go to Central Perk with me?" 

"No, Ross might be there."

"So?" Phoebe asked, "Are you not going to go somewhere, just because Ross could be there? Don't change your life because of him! Be yourself!"

"Your right!" Rachel said as she got up from the sofa and picked up Emma, "Let's go!"

After Phoebe got Rachel to go down she lied about having to use the telephone to call a client and went to the back of the coffee house. 

"So Ross?" Phoebe asked, "Come down to Central Perk with us?"

"Is Rachel there? Because we're not speaking now."

"No," Phoebe fibbed, "It'll just be you, me, Mon, Chandler, and Joey."

"Oh, ok then!" Ross agreed and then hung up to meet her.

When Ross entered Central Perk, Rachel and Ross noticed each other immediately.

"You!" Rachel accused while pointing at him.

"Hey!" Ross complained, "Phoebe, you said Rachel wasn't gonna be here!"

"Yeah, well I say a lot of things." 

Immediately after that, Ross and Rachel began bickering. 

"Well, you said that you would pick up dinner, but you didn't!" Ross accused.

"Yeah, well you won't quit being so annoying!" Rachel shot back.

After that, they're words became mixed together, as neither stopped yelling.

"Oh my God will you stop this?!" Chandler demanded, "You're giving me a head ache!"

Monica continued, "We got you here together so that you two could work things out, but obviously, that's impossible because you too are just two big babies!"

"You have a child!" Chandler reminded them, "Be mature for her, at least!" 

"You're right," Ross caved.

"Yeah, I agree." Rachel said.

"Good, now shake hands, make up, and get the hell out of my house!" Monica said frustrated.

"Wait…" Rachel looked at Monica suspiciously, "Was this all an act to get me out of your house?"

"No," Monica said hastily.

"You just wanted me out of your house! I'm not speaking to you!" She then pointed to Chandler, "And you too!"

"We're sorry Rach. It's just that we need our privacy. I mean we _are _married." Monica explained.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, tell it to the judge!" Rachel replied as she quickly exited the coffee house. 

"Good luck with her," Phoebe commented to Ross as she sipped her coffee casually.  

All right, here it is, the 9th fic in my series. Wow, I definitely didn't think I would make it this far! I really hope you still like it. Ok, please review, and hopefully the next fic will be up soon! It will also be more M&C then this one, I think. Thanks for reading!:)


	10. tow no privacy

TOW No Privacy

Ok the 10th fic in my series is up! I changed the rating of my series because of this one because it didn't seem very PG to me. I could've made it PG, but it didn't seem to get the idea across…lol. I know I took a little while longer to get this one up than usual, but I've had a lot of work lately and I've also been working on another series, which btw you should check out if you haven't already…lol of course I'd say that. Please read and review!:)

**What You Should Know:** Hmm…what should you know? I should go back to check my last fic and see what happened…lol short term memory. Ok, Mon's like 5 ½-6th months pregnant now. I'm trying to speed it up a little more b/c I want her to have the baby before I run out of ideas! lol. Ok last fic isn't really that important to this one—just wanted to show how little privacy and alone time Mon and Chandler have because of their friends.

**Disclaimer: **I own none of these characters, or any of the places where this fic takes place. 

Joey and Phoebe entered the coffee house together, with their heads hung low in shame. They made their way to their usual area, and Joey sat across from Ross, both sitting in the armchairs, while Phoebe took a seat next to Rachel on the orange sofa. 

Rachel and Ross shared a confused look, and then Rachel asked, "What's wrong guys?"

Hastily, Joey answered, "Nothing's wrong! Nothing at all."

Phoebe added, "Nope, nothing!" 

"Ok…" Ross said, unconvinced.

After a moment of silence, Joey cried out, "I can't hold it in anymore!"

Phoebe gasped, "No Joey, you mustn't tell anyone!"

"We saw things that we should not have seen!" he admitted.

"What did you see?" Rachel asked curiously.

Phoebe gave in and began, "We saw…"

She stopped talking when Monica and Chandler entered the coffee house. When the two of them sat down, Joey and Phoebe both looked away, embarrassed. Chandler and Monica also didn't look at Phoebe and Joey. 

"What's with all the awkwardness!?" Ross demanded.

"Nothing!" Monica answered angrily.

"No," Rachel claimed, "Phoebe was about to tell us!"

Monica and Chandler looked at Phoebe, shocked.

"Phoebe!" Chandler said insulted.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry. It's just too much to keep in. I have to tell someone!"

"Why?" Monica challenged, "It's none of your business to begin with!" 

"Yeah, you should've never been there to see it!" Chandler accused.

Joey began to gain confidence as he said, "Sorry man, but I mean, come on, on the couch? You didn't expect anyone to walk in? We always come into your apartment without knocking."

Rachel and Ross gasped, horrified, finally figuring out what was going on.

"Yeah," Phoebe agreed, also feeling less guilty, "You should've locked the door."

"Well sometimes," Chandler defended, "There isn't time to do that. Plus, locking the door is kinda the last thing on my mind at that time!"

"True," Joey nodded enthusiastically. 

"Ok, you know what?" Ross asked, "This is a conversation that I should _not _be here for! Luckily, I have to leave anyway." With that, he got up, put on his coat, and left the coffee house.

Once she noticed that no one was looking at each other again, Rachel decided to press for details.

"I don't get what the big deal is," Rachel stated.

"What?!" Monica asked furiously, "It's a very big deal! I don't walk in on any of you!"

"Yeah, I know. But I'm just saying that it's not that big of a deal because we've all seen you two doing it. I mean, that's how Phoebe found out, for one." 

Phoebe thought for a moment, and then shook her head. "No, it's different. For one thing, they weren't married yet. Two, we weren't in the same room as them. Three, I thought they were just fooling around then."

"I still don't see the difference." 

"Well, I don't care about the difference," Chandler added crossly, "You shouldn't see us…EVER!" 

"I agree," Joey concurred, "I mean, Chandler was on top, so all I saw was Chandler's ass. Not a pretty site. I mean, if I'm going to see anything, it should be Mon…" Joey stopped talking when he noticed the looks he was getting from everyone, especially Chandler.

"Joe, don't _ever_ say that again," he demanded.

"Sorry," Joey looked away sheepishly, "But your wife's hot!" 

Monica smiled, "Thanks Joey!"

Chandler's eyes widened as he looked at Monica and demanded, "What?!"

Joey looked up and smiled, "How you doin'?"

Now Chandler turned to Joey, "What?!"

Monica rubbed his arm soothingly, "No, it's not that. It's just nice to know that guys still find me attractive."

"Wh…why?" Chandler stuttered, "You're planning on leaving me?"

"No!" Monica defended, "It's just that, I'm getting older, and I'm pregnant and all…"

"Well isn't it enough that your husband thinks you're still hot?" Chandler asked, confused.

"No!" all the girls replied at once.

Chandler just shook his head as a reply. 

"Don't worry Chandler," Phoebe consoled, "She sure sounded like she was enjoying herself with you. As long as you keep her happy in bed…"

"Or on the couch," Joey added.

"Or on the couch," Phoebe agreed, "She won't leave you."

"What?!" Monica asked offended, "Stop talking about me during sex!"

"Well, it's hard to forget," Phoebe mimicked, "'oh Chandler, oh Chandler, you feel so good. Right there—that's the spot, yes, yes…'"

Monica yelled, horrified, "PHOEBE!!"

"She's not bluffing," Joey backed up to Rachel.

"Will you quit it now!?" Chandler asked, "It's definitely not something we should be taking about."

"You sure weren't asking to call it quits before," Joey added.

"Ok ya know what?" Monica asked, furiously, "I have to get to work. And quit talking about it!" 

Chandler helped Monica up and walked out with her. 

     "Wow," Rachel observed, "They're really mad at you guys. I think you should stop talking about it."

"Yeah, you're right," Joey relented.

"Yeah," Phoebe agreed, "But now I have some dirt on Chandler and Monica. If ya know…the time to use it ever presents itself." 

Joey nodded in agreement and Rachel smiled. 

Phoebe then warned, "I have dirt on all of you, so watch out!" 

Joey's eyes opened wide in horror as Rachel gasped. 

"Hey, a girl needs to be prepared for anything," Phoebe defended as she left the coffee house. 

"Ok, I think I'm beginning to really fear Phoebe," Rachel concluded.

"I've always been scared her," Joey added and off Rachel's look defended, " What? She can be dangerous! She lived on the streets for crying out loud!"

Rachel nodded her head in agreement as she picked up her coffee mug and a magazine. 

     When Chandler returned home from work that night, he greeted Monica, who was in the kitchen cooking dinner.

"Hey Mon, how was your day?" he asked as he kissed her on the lips.

"It was okay. I kind of miss working the dinner shift though."

"I know you do, but you can go back to it, once you give birth."

"Yeah," she agreed, "So how was your day?"

"Ehh," he said as he undid his tie and unbuttoned his five buttons, "Better now that I'm here with you."

Monica smiled as she put a chicken on the already set kitchen table.  

     As they began to eat, they chatted about their day, and other things. Neither wanting to get on the topic of what happened that morning. 

Finally, feeling brave, Chandler began, "Hey I was thinking…"

"For once," Monica joked, but seeing that he was being serious, she urged him to continue, "Go on."

"Well, since we're going to be having two babies, and we could sure use some privacy, that we should…move into a house." 

When Monica didn't answer, Chandler continued, "If you don't want to, we won't. I was just thinking that it's going to be so hard to raise two children in an apartment. Plus we have the money. I've been thinking about it for a while, and with the 'events' of the morning and when Rachel wouldn't leave our place a few weeks ago and all, it just…seems like the right thing to do now."

After Chandler stopped talking, he studied her face for an answer. She looked like she was deep in thought, so Chandler went back to eating his meal. 

After a minute, Monica jumped up, "We're moving?" she asked with glittery eyes. 

"We're moving!" Chandler stated happily.

Monica hugged Chandler tightly and then they kissed deeply. 

"I've wanted my own house for as long as I can remember!" Monica admitted while they were lying in bed that night, "Along with a husband and kids to have in there."

"Which you have now," Chandler reminded her.

"Which I have now," Monica repeated happily. 

"Well, where do you think we should we move?"

"No too far from the city, since we both work there. I was thinking of somewhere in Westchester. They have the nicest houses over on…"

"You already know where you want us to live, don't you?" Chandler teased.

Monica looked away sheepishly, "Not exactly. Just the general area."

Chandler smiled at her, "I should've known." 

Chandler turned out the lights, pecked her on the lips, and then they both began to drift off. After ten minutes, Monica suddenly sat up.

"What is it?" Chandler asked groggily. 

"Our friends are going to be mad, aren't they?"

"I forgot about that," Chandler admitted.

"Me too," Monica agreed quietly.

"They'll just have to accept it," Chandler stated defiantly. 

"Yeah! They knew this was coming."

"Of course!" 

They both began to drift off into sleep again, but neither could help but worry about what the reaction of their friends would be. 

Ok the end of my 10th fic in this series. It feels good to get this part out of my head on the computer. It's been stuck in there for a while. I hope that, if you get time off for Thanksgiving, you're living it to the fullest, as am I. Today is my "sleep in and be lazy day" (well till I have to leave for dinner) while the rest of the weekend I'm spending with my friends. Which is probably why I won't have another fic posted this weekend. Maybe tomorrow morning or Sunday I'll be able to sneak in time for it. Ok, well Happy Thanksgiving and if I don't post till after Fri., Happy Hanukkah to all who celebrate it. Any other holidays now that I'm forgetting? I'm sure I'll have on up before Christmas and New Years though, so I don't have to mention those now. All right, please read and review, thanks:) 


	11. tow joey and phoebe's plan

TOW Phoebe and Joey's Plan

All right, time to write chapter 11 of this series. Is it really worth continuing b/c the reviews are dying down dramatically here…I think I only got like 3 for the last chapter. I mean, that's not bad, but I've noticed that people aren't reviewing it. Does that mean u don't like it? Because if you don't, please tell me (in a nice way, of course) and tell me how to improve. It's very important to me! Ok, please read and review!:)

**Disclaimer: **I don't own any of these characters; you know the gist…

          "You're…moving?!" Joey cried out once Monica and Chandler broke the news to the rest of the gang.

"Joe, this is something we have to do," Chandler explained, trying to sooth Joey's pain.

"Why?!"

"Because, we're married now and we're having a family." 

Monica decided to add on, "Yeah Joey, you know that if anyone else were in our situation…"

Joey cut Monica off, "No way! Look," he gestured towards Rachel and Ross, who were sitting next to each other on the sofa, "They have a kid, but they're not moving."

"Yes, but they're not married, and they don't have two babies, like we will," Monica explained, "Plus, they're always complaining about raising one baby in an apartment, can u imagine two babies?!"

"Yeah, well…" Joey stammered for words, then pointed at Monica, "This is all you're fault!"

"What?! How is this _my _fault!"

"Well, if you had never felt depressed in London and got drunk and slept with Chandler, then the two of you would never had gotten together. Then, you wouldn't be pregnant with his children and moving with my best friend!"

"He's right," Phoebe agreed.

Jumping in before Monica had a chance to retaliate, Chandler consoled, "Joe, it's not like I'm moving to France or…Vermont," Chandler rolled his eyes and Joey nodded in comprehension;  "I'm just moving like a half an hour or less from the city. I'll still visit you, and you can visit me whenever you want to."

"Unless it's at 3 AM," Monica warned.

"Unless it's at 3 AM," Chandler agreed.

"What about 2:30 AM?" Joey questioned.

"No!" Monica answered.

"1?" 

Off Chandler's look he questioned again, "12?"

"Let me rephrase," Chandler sighed, "You can visit us whenever you want to between the hours of 8 AM and 11 PM."

"See, everything's changed already!" Joey whined.

          Later that day, in Central Perk, Rachel, Ross, Phoebe and Joey were sitting in their usual spot. 

"Wow," Rachel said, "I can't believe Mon and Chandler are moving!"

"Yeah, I know," Ross agreed, "But we all knew that the time would come…eventually. At least, for Monica; Chandler, on the other hand…"

The other three nodded their heads in agreement.

"I was thinking," Rachel began, "Maybe we should consider moving to a house."

"No!" Joey yelled, "I already lost two friends to the suburbs, I'm not losing anymore!"

"Yeah Rach," Phoebe agreed, "Don't leave me all alone in the city with all these maniacs!"

"Hey, I'm here," Joey stated, "I'll protect you."

"See…my point!"

"Hey!" 

"Ok, we're sorry," Ross consoled, "We won't move. Don't worry about it."

"Ok, good," Joey mumbled, and turned his attention towards Phoebe.

Then, Ross whispered to Rachel, "We'll talk about it later."

"Ok, I have to get back to work," Ross stated as he got up and put on his coat.

"Oooh, lucky college students!" Rachel commented sarcastically as she stood up also, "I would come and listen to all the interesting facts, but I unfortunately have to go back to work, too."

Together they left, leaving only Joey and Phoebe. Joey picked up a Time magazine and started to flip through it, bored by its contents, while Phoebe looked pensive. 

Suddenly, she stated, "Joey, I know how to get Monica and Chandler to stay!" 

Joey looked up from his magazine, "Yeah, how?"

"Well, I'm not sure yet."

Joey looked at her strangely, not understanding.

"But…I do know that we need a plan. We have to find a way to get them to stop from moving."

Joey snapped his fingers. "Oooh I got it! We lock them in their apartment! Then, they can never leave."

Phoebe thought about this idea for a moment. "Yeah…but what would we do when we wanna see a movie with them or something?"

"Yeah, you're right. Plus, I need Chandler to make money so that I can spent it." 

"Right, so we need something else."

Phoebe stared into space, thinking, while Joey squinted his eyes and scratched his chin repeatedly. While they were doing this, Chandler walked in. 

When he noticed Joey he asked, "Thinking again?"

"Uh huh," 

"Wow," Chandler teased, "It's been a while since the last time, huh?" 

"Yeah, I almost forgot how."

"I can imagine." 

          The next day, Phoebe and Joey entered Monica and Chandler's apartment together.  

"Ok, remember the plan," Phoebe warned Joey.

"Ok got it." Joey paused, "What is it again?"

Phoebe sighed, frustrated, "We have to convince them not to move."

"Right!"

"Ok, time for 'operation chandelier'!"

"Why chandelier?" 

"Because it's sounds cool, duh."

"Oh."

"And it's kinda close to Chandler."

Joey nodded in agreement and grabbed some food from the refrigerator. After a few minutes, Monica came out of the bathroom in her robe and put on a pot of coffee.

" 'Morning Mon," Phoebe greeted.

"What's so good about this morning?" Monica wondered bitterly.

"What's the matter?" Joey asked, his mouth full of cereal.

"I spent the last hour puking!"

"Been there!" Joey added.

"Yeah, I know," Monica said, and looked away, disgusted at the memories, "I've seen you throw up more times than I've thrown up myself." 

"Yeah baby!"

Monica shook her head, reproachful, and poured herself some coffee. 

"You know Mon," Phoebe began, while Chandler came out of his bedroom, "If you live in a house, it may be harder to get to a bathroom. Then, what will you do when you have morning sickness?"

Monica laughed, "When we move, we'll be getting a nice house where there'll be a bathroom in my bedroom! What's more convenient than that?" 

"A bedpan?" Chandler guessed as he grabbed a coffee mug and filled it up. 

Frustrated, Phoebe began to think up more excuses for them not to move.

"You know," Joey informed them, "A few weeks ago, I remember reading that…"

Monica cut him off, "Since when do you read?"

Joey looked away, sheepishly, Ok, I was watching on tv…"

"There ya go!" Chandler commented.

"Anyway, I was watching a special about how horrible living in the suburbs is."

Monica and Chandler looked at him skeptically.

"Yeah, I saw that, too!" Phoebe agreed, "They claimed that the crime rate is really high there. Just no one knows about it because…" Phoebe trailed off, unsure how to finish.

"Because the criminals there are smarter!" Joey finished for her, "So people can't figure out that they committed the crimes!"

"Yeah!" 

"Maybe the people are just dumber there," Chandler suggested.

"Phoebe, I thought you didn't watch the news," Monica asked, confused.

"When did I say that?"

"Well, you've been boycotting it ever since they covered that story about you beating up that guy in the ally…" 

"Right, I forgot," Phoebe looked away awkwardly. 

Stumped for ideas, Phoebe whispered to Joey, "Plan B!"

"Right!" 

Immediately after that, Joey grabbed Chandler and Phoebe grabbed Monica. 

"Woah, what the hell are you doing?" Chandler demanded.

"Let go of me!" Monica squirmed, trying to free herself from Phoebe's grasp.

"We'll only let you two go if you agree to our terms!"

"What terms?" Chandler asked panting. 

"Well," Phoebe began, "First of all, you have to agree not to move."

"What?!" Monica fumed.

Phoebe tightened her grip around Monica's arms, "Oww…stop it!"

"Second, I want your new Calvin Klein jeans.

"We never discussed that," Joey questioned.

"It's my own thing…creative, huh?" 

Chandler somehow wiggled his way free of Joey's grip, "Wow, didn't know I could do that." 

"Chandler!" Monica scolded.

"Right!" he said, dodging Joey.

"Come on, just stop this!" Monica demanded.

"She's right," Joey relented, "We should be locking them up!" 

Before Joey could lunge for Chandler, he stated, "Come on, just wait a minute!"

Instead, Joey grabbed him again, and held his hands tightly behind his back. "This is for your own good!"

          Just then, Ross entered the apartment. "What's going on here?" he asked, noticing the scene before him.

"Nothing…"

"Let go of them!" Ross demanded. 

Phoebe huffed, "Fine."

"Thank God!" Chandler praised, while rubbing his arms.

"What did you do that for?" Ross questioned.

"We don't want them to move!" Joey cried.

"We're sorry Joe," Chandler counseled, "But this is something that we both really want and need now."

Joey looked down stubbornly, not willing himself to listen Chandler's words. 

"Come on Joey! We really need this. Not to mention how we really want some privacy." Monica added.

"We give you privacy!" Phoebe defended.

"Right," Monica chucked, "Like when you walked in on us 'doing it' a few weeks ago." 

"Hey, that's not our fault!" Off Monica's look, Joey conceded, "Ok maybe it was. But still…"

"But still nothing. It's not only that."

"I mean, last week, Ross walked in on me while I was in the bathroom."

"Hey man!" Ross scolded to Chandler, "We promised not to mention that again!" 

"We're sorry guys," Monica said sadly.

"I guess they're right. We do invade their privacy a lot."

"Hey Pheebs, you're giving in, too?!"

"Sorry Joe."

Joey looked at Chandler and began to cry. "I'm just gonna miss you so much man!" 

"I know, but we'll still hang out. Don't worry." 

Joey hugged Chandler tightly, almost causing him to fall over.

"Woah, watch it there," Chandler warned. 

"Are you sure that…I can't just keep one of the babies?" Joey attempted.

Monica gave him an angry look.

"Oh come on Mon, you can come over and see it whenever you want to!"

Chandler shook his head, "Sorry Joe."

"Ok fine," Joey relented, "But you have to promise me one thing."

"Yeah?"

"You name one of the babies after me."

Monica scowled and then said, "Middle name or nothing."

"Deal!" Joey said happily as he shook Monica's hand. 

 Ok, there ya go. Phew, 11 chapters. Wow, that's a hell of a lot to write. The fic is gonna end soon b/c I want to move on to other things. Plus, the interest seems to fading in this. But, don't worry, I will have Monica give birth! Ok, hope u enjoyed the fic. Oh and I'm really sorry about not including Kwanzaa in my lists of holidays before, but I wasn't sure when that was, so I didn't want to mention it. I mean, I know it's soon, but I wasn't exactly sure. Ok, please read and review! :) 


	12. tow a guy hits on chandler

TOW a Guy Hits on Chandler

Snow day, a-whoohoo! Of course, it's 8:20 and I'm up already. I can never sleep late…pisses me off. I'm always tired, too. Oh well, it gives me time to accomplish the billion things I have to do today. I really needed this day off! Yay, so happy! Oh and I'm glad that people still like this…I was getting worried there for a sec. I mean, I post fics so that other people can enjoy them, so if no one likes them, then it's worthless. All right, let's get this show on the road. Enjoy!:)

          Monica and Chandler sat in Central perk, looking through a realtor magazine. 

"Oooh," Monica exclaimed while circling a house.

"Oh my God," Chandler complained, "That's the 15th house!"

"So?"

"We don't have time to look at 15 houses."

"Well, I'll just pick my favorites to look at first."

"Ok, pick out your favorites."

Monica put the magazine close to her face and concentrated intensely. Chandler sipped his coffee as he watched her. 

"Any luck?"

"This is hard."

"Ok…"

"I can't choose!" Monica cried. 

Chandler wore a triumphant smile and quipped, "Shocker!" 

She gave him an angry look and threw the magazine at him. 

"You choose."

"Fine," he said as he looked through the magazine.

"Ok, this one," he said pointing to the first page, "This one…"

"Really, _that _one?"

"I thought that you loved all of them so much, so why would it matter which I choose?" 

"Because you chose _that _one!"

"Fine, not that one." Chandler turned the page and pointed to another house, "This one better?"

"Ehh…it doesn't have a pool, I want a pool."

"A pool?! Do you know how expensive those are?"

"Yes…," Monica lied. 

"Ok, there's the cost of chlorine, the water, servicing, cleaning, etc. Then there's all this work we have to put into it. Not to mention the insurance factor…I mean, what if some kid drowns?" 

"Fine, no pool," Monica relented.

"There ya go."

"How 'bout a Jacuzzi?" 

"How 'bout…not." 

          A few minutes later, Joey entered the coffee house and sat down on the chair closer to the counter. 

"What are you guys looking at?" 

"Houses," Monica answered distractedly, while Chandler was drifting off to sleep. 

"Chandler!" Monica yelled.

Chandler jumped up, "W…what?!"

Before Monica could answer, Joey started to chuckle. 

"What?" Chandler asked, irritated.

"You should've seen you jump up. You looked like a frog would, ya know, if it were a human."

"Right, human frogs…what's next, cow pigs?"

"Oooh cow pigs, good idea!" Joey exclaimed, while writing on his hand.

"I'm not even going to ask…"

"Chandler!" Monica yelled again.

"Yes dear?" he asked, trying to hide his frustration.

"I've decided."

"Yeah? Great!" Chandler sighed in relief. 

"Let me see!" Joey demanded, while snatching the magazine.

"Ehh…I like this one!" he said, pointing to another house.

"Ooooh, that's nice!" Monica decided, "How did I not see it?"

Joey shrugged while Chandler sighed, "Here we go again." 

          A few days later, Monica and Chandler began their house search. 

"Ok," the curly haired realtor explained, "Here's the first house." 

She began to talk about the house, but both Chandler and Monica did not pay much attention to her babbling. 

"Wow, look at that kitchen!" Monica exclaimed as she walked through the kitchen, which was equipped with two sinks and marble counters. 

Once they toured the house, they made their way into the backyard. 

"It's nice," Chandler commented.

"Yeah, it is," a man in the distance answered.

"Ahh!" Chandler screamed as he darted his head from side to side, "Who the hell was that?"

The man came up from the other side of the fence, "Hi, I'm the neighbor, John. You interested in the place?"

"Yes, we are," Monica replied, "Is there anything you could tell us about it?"

"Hmm…very nice area. I've been living here for twenty years, and the Misses and me love it here. 

"Really?"

"Are you like Wilson or something?" Chandler joked.

"Excuse me?"

Monica rolled her eyes, "He's referring to the neighbor on the show Home Improvement." 

"Never watched it."

"Really?" 

"Chandler, what do you expect? You just watched it in order to see that kid…Jonathon Taylor Thomas."

"Did not!" Chandler defended, "I happen to find Tim Allen very amusing."

"Uh huh, sure."

"Well, I wouldn't be talking! You're the one who watches the cooking channel when no one's around."

Monica looked shocked, "You know about that?!"

"Who doesn't?"

"Hey," she defended, "A lot of people watch the cooking channel. I am, after all, a chef. I get my ideas from there."

"Sure, a lot of people do watch the cooking channel. However, only a select few actually drool over it! Literally." 

Monica hit Chandler's arm and headed back into the house. Chandler looked away sheepishly. 

"Hey, you two don't seem to get along too well," John offered, "If you don't want her, you can have me."

"Excuse me?" Chandler asked, confused.

"What? Your cute!"

Chandler's eyes opened wide as he noticed what was going on, "Don't you have a wife?"

"Yeah, but she doesn't look _anything _like you do!"

Chandler stared at him strangely for a moment and declared, "I…I'm going inside. I don't think I'll come out her again…ever." With that he ran towards the house, looking over his shoulder, freaked. 

          That night, the gang congregated in Central Perk. 

"So," asked Ross, "How did the house hunting go?"

"Tiring," Chandler answered.

"After 8 houses, we finally chose one. We're hoping everything will go all right with it."

"Wow, that's pretty quick…in one day…" Rachel commented. 

"Yeah, well we have to move as soon as possible," explained Monica.

"Right. Is it really nice?"

"Yeah, it really is!" Monica commented, "There was one other house I really loved, but we couldn't get that one…"

"Why not?" Phoebe wondered.

Monica began laughing hysterically, "The neighbor hit on him!"

The rest began laughing, also, while Chandler looked disgusted.

"Ha, ha very funny! Now can we _please _ stop talking about it?"

"Sure, you fox!" Phoebe commented. 

"Did you get his number?" Ross joked, still laughing.

"Why?" Chandler asked smugly, "You want it?"

Ross stopped laughing while the rest began laughing even harder. 

"I'm not going to take this abuse any longer!" Ross stated, while standing.

"We're sorry," Monica apologized, still laughing.

"Where are you going? To call that guy?" Phoebe asked.

Ross sat back down, defeated. 

"Looks like I'm the only straight guy here," Joey said proudly.

"That's what you think," Phoebe commented. 

"What?!" Joey demanded. 

"You know what I'm talking about."

"No I don't!"

"Well, if you don't know, I'm not going to tell you."

The rest of the gang looked at Phoebe strangely, but she didn't seem to notice.

Ok, that's all folks! (Oops, wrong show.) I hope u liked it. Please read and review! Thanks!:) Next chapter should be up soon…


	13. tow they try to escape from monica

TOW They Try to Escape from Monica

Here's part 13 in my series. Right now, it feels like this will be the 3rd to last chapter. Ok, since I'm not really in a talky mood right now…here it is. Please read and review, thanks. 

**Disclaimer: **I don't own these characters, blah, blah, blah. 

          Ross, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey gathered in Chandler and Monica's living room, waiting for Chandler to come in. 

"I hate all these boxes around," Phoebe said. Everyone agreed with her and she continued, "It reminds me of when I lived out on the streets. Except, of course, no rats."

"Of course," Ross answered while raising his eyebrows.

"Why do you think Chandler called us here?" Rachel asked. 

"He wants us to get him a date?" Joey suggested.

Ross looked at him for a few moments before he realized. Joey chucked, embarrassed, "Oh, right." 

Then Chandler came into the apartment. "Good you're all here."

Ross asked, "What's up man?" 

"Ok, well since we're moving soon, I was hoping that you guys would help unpack."

They all groaned at his suggestion. 

"Come on," Joey complained, "We're letting you move, what else do you want from us?" 

"Hey, I wouldn't ask normally! But the babies are due in like two months and we have to get the house set up! We can't bring the babies home to a house full of boxes…have them sleep in empty drawers! Plus, Monica can't do much unpacking, so it's pretty much just me…and we know how that'll go."

"I'm picturing a bookcase falling on you, Chandler," Rachel admitted. 

"Exactly my point! Come on, you don't want me to _die_ do you?"

"Well…" Phoebe began.

Chandler gave her an angry look, and Phoebe smiled apologetically. "You don't want Monica to be a widow and my kids to grow up without a father! Can you picture what my obituary would say…'man dies trying to assemble crib for his children'." 

Rachel laughed, "How pathetic would that be?"

"Hey if you died, I bet she'd go back to Richard," Phoebe informed Chandler, "Then your kids would be raised by Richard…they'd call him their dad and…"

"Oh my God!" Chandler cried. 

"Ok, we'll help," Ross relented, with the others groaning in the background. 

"Thank you!" Chandler jumped up happily and went into his bedroom. 

The other three looked at Ross angrily, "What?" he asked innocently. 

           A few weeks later, moving day came and went. The day after they moved, the gang congregated in Chandler and Monica's house. 

"Wow," Rachel breathed, looking at the living room, containing a high ceiling and wooden floors, "It's so nice…for an affordable house." 

Monica rolled her eyes, "Thanks Rach…I think." 

Chandler opened a box and rummaged through it. "Hey Joe, go long!" he called, as he pulled out a nerf football and spiraled it through the living room. 

"Chandler!" Monica called angrily.

"Got it!" Joey called, but fell over a box and landed flat on his back. 

"See what happens when you boys play in the house," Rachel joked. 

"Oww…" Joey complained, "My back." 

Phoebe looked down at Joey and teased, "Looks like you just 'pulled a Chandler'."

"Excuse me?" Chandler asked, insulted.

"Phoebe!" Monica reprimanded. 

"Oops…I forgot your rule." 

"What rule?!"

"The rule that no one can say 'pulled a Chandler' around Chandler." 

"Why do you say it at all?!"

"We don't," Phoebe bluffed. 

"Right…" 

"Don't worry about it hunny, it's just a joke."

"Do you use it?" 

Monica looked around nervously, "Ok, let's start unpacking!" 

"You use it, don't you?" 

Monica looked down, "Maybe…but you can't be made at me."

"Why not?!"

"Because I'm pregnant with your children."

Chandler sighed, "I can't wait till you can't use that excuse anymore." 

Monica smiled and kissed him on the cheek. Then she clapped her hands and demanded, "Ok, let's get to work people! Time is money!" 

"We're getting paid?" Joey asked hopefully.

"No", Ross explained,  "It's just an expression, Joey."

"Well, that's a deceitful expression!" sulked Joey. 

Suddenly, Chandler claimed, "I am not _that _clumsy."

Monica sighed frustrated, "You are Chandler. We've been through this before." 

"I'll show you!" Chandler mumbled. 

          After a few hours of packing, the exhausted five friends had enough. 

"Come on Mon," Ross complained, "We're tired. Let us take a break."

"No!" Monica demanded, "There's only 5 more rooms to go!"

They all grumbled and got back to work. 

"You know what," Chandler suggested after a while, "How about we unpack as little as possible, wait till our kids are old enough, and then make _them _unpack!"

"You're a funny man, Bing. So funny that if you don't shut up, you'll spend your second night in the new house sleeping on the sofa." 

"Right, getting back to work!"

"Well, I can joke, right?" Joey asked, "I mean, when I sleep here, I'll sleep on the sofa anyway."

"Who said you'll be sleeping here?" Monica challenged. 

"Because Mon, I'm not coming over _every _morning for breakfast. Some mornings, I'll sleep here, so I don't have to get up as early for breakfast."

Chandler mused, "Our children are going to grow up thinking Joey's their second father, aren't they?" 

"Joey, you're not eating here every morning. We have _children _to take care of; not Joey to take care of." 

"It's bad enough that you stole my best friend—but you cannot take my breakfast away from me!" Joey cried.

Monica rolled her eyes, "Fine Joey. Just stay out of my way and get to work now!"

"Yes sir." Monica gave him a look, and he corrected quickly, "Ma'am."

          After another few hours of packing, Phoebe had enough. 

"Ok, I'm exhausted!" Phoebe claimed when Monica had left the room, "I say that we make a break for it." 

"Could we?" Rachel asked hopefully. 

"I think so," Phoebe said, taking charge, "You all have potential, except Chandler." 

"Why?" he asked bitterly, "B/c I'm gonna _pull a chandler_?"

"Well duh…but I wasn't thinking of that. You're her husband…she'll notice."

"Yeah, she calls you for everything."

"That's not true. She hasn't called me in…" he looked down at his watch, "Two minutes." 

"Chandler!" Monica called from the other room. 

"Damn," Chandler said as he left the room. 

"Ok, we're gonna have take shifts. Two people leave at a time…one girl and one guy."

"Why one girl and one guy?" Ross asked.

"Because…she'd notice if there were only two girls or only two guys."

"But she wouldn't notice that one girl and one guy were missing?" 

"Well…there's less of a change," Phoebe paused, "Are you with me or are you trying to plan this logically?" 

Ross sighed, "No, I'm with you."

"Just don't let her find out," Rachel warned, "Or she may not speak to us for the next five years."

"Right now that doesn't seem so bad," Joey mumbled, exhausted. 

"Ok," Phoebe whispered, "Joey and I will go first."

"What?!" Rachel demanded, "Why do I have to get stuck with Ross?!"

"Hey!" Ross demanded. 

"Yeah, well, I don't want to be with Ross either."

"Excuse me…I'm right here!"

"Ok, we'll do a coin toss," Rachel suggested, taking out a quarter. 

Ross sighed, defeated. 

Rachel flipped it and Phoebe called, "Heads!" 

Rachel smiled triumphantly, "Tails! You lose!" 

"Fine, but we get to leave first," Phoebe demanded.

"Fine," Rachel relented. 

          Phoebe and Ross left the room, while Joey and Rachel continued unpacking. 

"I bet they never come back for their shift," Rachel mumbled. 

They heard the front door open and then Monica ask, "Where are you guys going?" 

"Ha, ha, looks like they got caught," Rachel said happily. 

Joey sulked, "Yeah, but now we can't go!" 

Rachel thought about what Joey said for a minute, "Damn!" 

When Monica asked them, Phoebe said under her breath, "Oh no…" 

"Where were you going?" 

"Umm…" Ross stuttered, "We were going to get more…nails, yeah nails."

Monica looked from Ross to Phoebe, suspiciously, "I told you guys that there were nails in the kitchen."

Mocking surprise Phoebe covered up, "You did? I don't remember that! Do you Ross?"

Ross laughed nervously, "Nope, no, I do not remember that Phoebe. Let's go in the kitchen and get some nails, then."

Monica sighed, "If you guys wanna leave so badly then…just go…" 

"Thanks Mon!" Phoebe said, and left.

"Yeah, sorry, I love you sis!" Ross assured and ran out. 

"Can I go, too?" Chandler wondered. 

"Ok, you're on the couch now!" Monica snapped. 

Chandler mumbled under his breath and walked away. 

Monica entered the room where Rachel and Joey were, to find that they had already escaped. 

"Some friends," Monica said bitterly as she sat down on a chair. 

          Nervously, Chandler tiptoed into the room, hoping to avoid being yelled at. 

"I can't believe they left," Monica recalled sadly. 

Chandler went over to her and sat on the ground next to her. 

"I'm sorry sweetie," he soothed while he rubbed her back. 

"Am I really so horrible that I drive them away?"

"No!" Chandler assured her, "It's just that…you worked them really hard. They were all really exhausted and bored. I'm sure they'll come back tomorrow for a couple of hours. Just not an entire day, like today."

"I don't get it…I would love to spend a day unpacking!"

"Yeah well, Monica," Chandler said in a soft tone, "Most people don't get you either." 

"Thanks," she replied sarcastically, "You know, I was thinking of letting you sleep in our room tonight, but now I'm not so sure…"

Chandler looked at her with sad, puppy dog eyes, "But all I wanna do is sleep next to my beautiful wife, that I love."

"Fine," Monica relented, "But you have to promise me one thing."

"Sure…?"

"You can't tell anyone I let you. They'll think I'm turning soft."

Chandler smiled and kissed her, "I won't tell a soul." 

That was part 13…I hope u liked it! Please leave a review…thanks!:)


	14. tow monica's bored

TOW Monica's Bored

WOW…thanks for all the great reviews on the last chapter. I was really surprised to find that most of the reviews in my mailbox Sat. were for this series. And to think, I didn't have to threaten u or guilt u into it. Question…did any of u think that last week's epi of friends was both incredibly boring and extremely hilarious? I was soo bored during the Ross and Mike parts, not to mention Rachel and "Omg he looked at me!" But Joey, Chandler, and Monica...very funny. Sorry, had to say that and it's only my opinion…not trying to bash anyone who thought the other parts were interesting. FYI, as of now in this fic, Monica isn't working at all. Oh and she's 8 months pregnant. Ok, well here's the next fic in the series. Read, review, and hopefully enjoy!:)

**Disclaimer: **You know how it goes…I own none of these characters, yada, yada, yada.

          Chandler woke up and rose out of his bed quietly, as to not wake up Monica, who was sleeping next to him. He went into the bathroom, where he brushed his teeth, showered, and shaved. Once he was finished in the bathroom, he walked out quietly and opened his closet to get his work clothes out. 

"What the hell?" he mumbled as he looked inside his closet. 

His shirts, ties, and suits were color coordinated, and his shoes aligned at the bottom of his closet. 

"Oh my God. Did I do that and not even remember? I'm turning into Monica!"

Once he got dressed, he went down into his kitchen. Deciding to just eat cereal, he opened the cabinet, to find that his cereal was missing.

"What the hell?" he asked angrily. 

In place of his cereal, he saw that there were containers of sugar, flour, and other cooking supplies. 

"Uch," he said frustrated, "I'm gonna be late!"

He searched franticly through the cabinets, but did not find his cereal. Finally, he gave up and grabbed a candy bar from the counter. 

"Mental note," he mumbled as he grabbed his briefcase and headed for the door, "Talk to Monica."

          Later that morning, Monica woke up and headed towards the kitchen. She opened the cabinet, and immediately found the cereal behind her cooking ingredients. While eating the cereal, she picked up the phone and called Chandler. 

"Hey Mon," he greeted when he picked up the phone.

"Hi, how's work going?"

"Ehh…it's pretty boring."

"Just like I am, at home." 

"I'm sorry sweetie. But even you agreed that it would be best if you stopped working for a while."

"Yeah, I know…"

"While we're on the topic of your days at home, I have two questions for you."

"Yeah?"

"Ok, since when do I color coordinate my clothes?" 

"Since I got bored and decided to do it."

"I see. And since when do we not keep the cereal in the top cabinet?"

"What are you taking about, we do."

"Well, I didn't see it."

"It's behind the flour and sugar."

"Ok…so since when do we keep the flour and sugar there?"

"Since I felt like it. Got a problem with that?"

"No," he sighed. 

"Good."

"Any other changes I should know about?"

"More than I can count."

"Great," he said sarcastically, "I'm glad I saved money all these years so that _you_ could own a house." 

"Me too!" she agreed, ignoring his sarcasm.

"Ok, as much fun as this conversation has been, I have to get back to work. I have an important meeting today."

"No, come on, stay on the phone! I'm so bored!"

"Call someone else."

"Fine," she agreed reluctantly, "Bye!" 

"I love you."

"Uh huh," she said as she hung up the phone. 

Chandler held the phone in his hand for a moment longer and shook his head. He then put his phone away in his pocket, and it began ringing a minute later. He picked it up and sighed.

"Yes hun?" 

"Where's my chocolate bar?" 

Chandler looked down at his desk where the chocolate's wrapper was. He quickly shoved it in the trashcan.

"I have no idea sweetie. Maybe Joey ate it."

"Yeah, I guess so. Bye."

He replied quickly, "Buh bye now."

          Monica picked up the phone again and began dialing.

"Hey Joey," she said into the receiver.

"Hey Mon, what's up?"

"Are you busy now?"

"Am I ever busy?"

"Good question."

"Why? What's up?"

"I'm bored. Will you come over?"

"I dunno," he answered skeptically, "What are we going to be doing?"

"Hang out, I guess."

"No cleaning?" 

She chucked, "No cleaning."

"You swear?!" 

"Yes, Joey. I swear no cleaning."

"All right, if I come over, you have to do something for me."

"Yeah?"

"Cook for me!"

She laughed, "Of course Joe. I wouldn't expect not to." 

"Good. I'll be there as soon as possible." With that, he hastily hung up the phone, grabbed his coat, and ran out of the apartment.

          "Oh my God!" Monica said while laughing uncontrollably, "I can't believe you did that to him!"

"Yup. Every week I used to call up Chandler and pretend to be a woman. And I would say," in he a high voice, "I love you, Chandler Bing." 

At this point in time, she was laughing so hard, that she was almost crying.

"Oh my God! I can't believe he never mentioned it! Why'd you stop calling?"

Joey looked away sheepishly, "He started using Star 69. I also tried to call him after that, pretending to be other things, ya know, like strippers, hookers, male strippers, male hookers…but he knew it was me. Ya know, that Chandler's a smart guy."

"Yeah well, there are a few reasons why I love him."

"Really, like what?"

She stared at Joey with a confused look on her face. "What? I'm not in love with him." 

Monica ignored Joey's last statement. "Come on. Let's play a game…oooh I know!" 

"Something with porn? I know Chandler has some around here somewhere…" he said as he began to look around.

"No porn. And he'd better not have porn around my house! He can go to your apartment for that." Monica paused, thinking, "Oooh, checkers! I haven't played that in such a long time!"

"Fine. But I still like my idea better." 

          After about 30 minutes of playing, Joey groaned, "Monica…this is so boring! Let's stop playing. 

"No, come on! Don't be a chicken! You're just upset because I'm beating you."

"No," Joey corrected, "I'm upset because you've been cheating."

"I have not!"

"Yeah? Well, since when can you jump five pieces at once?"

"Since always."

"And…I know that when you pointed out the window to show me that 'really cool squirrel' you stole two of your pieces back!"

"Did not!"

"It was a really cool squirrel though." Joey then paused and looked at her, smiling. 

"What?" she asked irritated. 

"You're gonna cheat with your kids, aren't you?" 

"No…"

"Yes you are. Kids are always supposed to be allowed to win, but you're not going to let them."

"Well, I'm not going to _let them_ win. But if they win, I'll walk away gracefully."

"Sure you will," Joey teased, "_You're kids_ are going to have to cheat to let_ you_ win!"

"Will not!"

Joey just continued to laugh at her, until she had enough. "Okay Joey, that's it. Leave. I don't need you here anymore!"

"Fine," he said, while still laughing at her, "Whatever. I have porn waiting for me at home. No offense, but porn's a hell of a lot more interesting than you…at least when you're fully dressed it is." 

"Shut up!" Monica said as she made a fist.

"I'm going, I'm going," Joey assured her, and ran out quickly. 

          However, again Monica was left extremely bored. She picked up the phone, but after a few attempts, she put it back down on its cradle. She began to feel a strange feeling in her stomach. However, it went away and so she didn't worry about it. Instead, she turned on the television and flipped through the channels.

"Uch, over 500 channels and nothing to watch!" she complained bitterly as she shut off the television.

Again, she picked up the telephone. This time, she got through.

In a seductive tone, she said "Hey sexy."

"Hi Monica," Chandler answered tediously.  

"No it's not Monica; it's Borris," she answered, but began laughing hysterically.

"Are you…drunk?" he asked frantically, "Please tell me you're not!"

"No, I'm just sooo bored." 

"I'm sorry that you're bored. But I really have to get back to work." 

"Noooo!"

"Yeeees, bye Mon!" After that, he hung up the phone.

Suddenly, Monica's competitive side kicked in as she picked up the phone again and called him back.

"Monica!" he reprimanded, "I'm serious." With that he hung up the phone.

After Monica had called him about 50 times, Chandler decided to turn off his cell phone. Defeated, Monica sunk back into the sofa and turned picked up a book. 

          Chandler was sitting in his office with two professionally dressed men. The man at Chandler's right was discussing the W.E.N.U.S., and Chandler was extremely bored, and not hiding it well. 

"Chandler are you listening?" the other man asked.

"Why yes, of course!" The two men bought that and got back to their work. 

Suddenly, Chandler's cell phone began to ring.

"Sorry. I shouldn't have turned it back on," he apologized as he shut it off. Then, after about 20 minutes, his secretary buzzed him. 

"Mr. Bing, you have a phone call; it's an emergency."

"Is it my wife again?" Chandler questioned frustrated.

"Problems with the misses?" the man on his left asked.

"No…no. She's just bored today and has been calling me none stop."

The three turned back to their work, when Chandler was buzzed again.

"Yes?"

"It's you're brother-in-law. And he told me to tell you 'pick of the damn phone, it's not a joke." 

Chandler ran his hands through his hair and picked up the phone.

"We're never gonna get any work done," the man on his right complained.

"What?!" Chandler yelled, "But it's too early!" He paused, listening, and trying to breath. 

"Ok, ok. I'll be right there."

He hung up the phone and tugged at his tie, hyperventilating. 

"My wife's in labor," he stated nervously. When he realized the importance of the matter, he jumped over his desk, landing flat on his face. He muttered and got up off the ground. He looked around the room at the worried faces staring at him for a moment and then ran out of the room.

That's it for this chapter. Next one, Monica's gonna have the babies. Ooo how exciting! I guess that means this is my second to last fic in this series. :( I know you all must be crying…lol j/k. Anyways, please leave me a review b/c the final days are approaching! Thanks for reading!:)


	15. tow monica and chandler's babiespt 1

TOW Monica and Chandler's Babies

Sorry that it's been a while for this fic, but I've had a TON of hw this week. Wow, so this is probably my last chapter b/c I don't think that I should continue. I mean I could…but I think that this fic has run its course. 15 chapters are a lot, right? So I'm thinking that this'll be my last and then, if anybody wants, I'll put up some sort of epilogue type thing. Ok, anyway, YAY CHANDLER'S HOME! The miracle of Christmas, ey? I haven't been able to talk to anyone about it, and I'm dying! See, I have one friend who watches Friends all the time, and is a fanatic like me, but she hasn't been online since Wed. and she lives in NY so I don't call her (I live in PA). That's about it…some of my other friends watch it once in a while, but otherwise…no one! My friends suck…lol. If anyone's ever looking to discuss Friends, then IM me b/c I always am…lol. Ok, after my "public service announcement", let's get this fic started. No tears now…ok * sniff * I think I've already started…lol. Please read and review, thanks!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own these characters or anything else mentioned in this fic, pretty much. Just the storyline, which I bet is also borrowed from somewhere b/c I don't seem to be very creative…lol.

          Chandler was sitting in a taxi, stuck in traffic, trying his very hardest to sit still. 

"Hey man," Chandler said to the driver, "Is there anyway that you can get me to the hospital faster?"

"Naw, theer ain't," the cab driver answered in a strange mix of a New York accent and something else, that Chandler didn't recognize. 

"But my wife is having a baby! I need to be there now!"

"Well, I'm soorry, but ya gotta wait buddy. So jist sit back and shut t'hell up!"  The cab driver then closed the glass window behind him. 

"Damnit," Chandler mumbled as he tapped his fingers on the side of the door. He could not keep himself from fidgeting. Once they were a few blocks away from the hospital, Chandler couldn't take it anymore. He knocked on the window loudly until the taxi driver opened it.

"Whit do ya want now?" 

"Here," Chandler said as he threw a pile of money on the seat next to the driver, "Keep the change!" After he said that, Chandler dashed out of the cab and up the streets. 

          When he got there, he ran up the stairs to the maternity ward, too impatient to take the elevator. When he got there, he ran to the receptionist desk and quickly tried to catch his breath. 

"I'm having a baby! I'm having a baby!" he yelled breathlessly. 

The receptionist looked at him strangely, "Excuse me?"

"Chandler, there you are!" Ross greeted as he came around the corner, "Come on!" 

"Ok!" he said and followed Ross. 

          Once they got outside of the room, Ross stopped him before they could go in. 

"Here, some advice from the man who's done this twice."

"Please!"

"Ok, don't act nervous because you're gonna get Monica more nervous."

Chandler fidgeted with his hands, "Got it."

"I said don't act nervous."

"I'm not in there yet!"

"Fine. Second…do anything she asks you to do. Like, if she asks you to leave, leave. If she asks you to stay, stay."

"Ok, do whatever she says. That shouldn't be too hard. I do that anyways." 

"Third, do not, I repeat _do not_ complain when she squeezes your hand until it's more than just sore." 

Nervously, he replied, "Okay…"

"You'll do fine!"

Gaining confidence he agreed, "Yeah!"

"Great! Go on in there and have some babies man!"

Chandler jumped up and down for a second and then went inside.

"He's a dead man," Ross decided once Chandler went in. 

          "I'm here. I'm sooooooo sorry Mon!" he apologized as he stood by her side.

"Where the hell were you?"

"Traffic! I even got out of the taxi, five blocks from here, and ran it."

Monica, Phoebe, Rachel, Joey, and Ross all laughed at that comment. 

"What?"

Rachel kept laughing, but answered, "It's just hard to picture _you _running."

"Yeah well, you'd be surprised what adrenaline can do."

"Is that like viagra?" Joey questioned.

"Hell no! And I _don't _need it! I helped make these babies on my own."

"Sure ya did," Phoebe teased.

"Hey I can get it up. I'll show you all right here, right now."

"Not now…maybe some other time…" Rachel said with her eyes wide opened.

Joey demanded, "No! No other time! We believe you!" 

"As much as I love this conversation," Monica interrupted in pain, contraction!" 

"Ok, I can do this," Chandler replied giving her his hand that she was waiting for. After making a couple of discomforted faces, he was able to just bite his lip and wait it out, while couching her. 

After the contraction was over and Monica relaxed, Chandler complimented, "There ya go sweetie. You're doing so well." 

Monica smiled faintly, "I know!"

Chandler sat down in the chair next to her bed and examined his hand. However, he noticed Ross glaring him and stopped. 

          An hour later, only Ross, Phoebe, and Chandler were congregated in Monica's room. 

"Oooh, I have a song for you!" Phoebe said suddenly as she grabbed her guitar. 

"Ya know what Pheebs," Monica said gently, "I'm not in much of a song hearing mood."

"No, that's not true! Everyone likes a good song, especially at times like this. You'll see."

"Pheebs…" Chandler began, but Phoebe cut him off by strumming her guitar. 

"Oh, we're stuck her waiting for the babies to out,

But no, you don't have to pout,

Because I have a song for you-ooo-ooo," 

"Pheebs, please don't…" Ross warned, but Phoebe didn't listen.

"Childbirth is hard and it hurts bad,

Not to mention all the blood it has. 

You push and push and push and push and push,

And push and push and push and…"  
Monica was near tears, "Oh my God!"

"Phoebe, stop!" Chandler yelled at her.

"Oh my God Mon, I didn't think it would scare you!"

"Well it did!"

"It doesn't hurt that badly."

"Really?"

Phoebe looked down at the ground, "No, it does. I was just trying to make you feel better," Phoebe paused, and then looked down at her wrist, "Oh look at the time…maybe I should go for a bit." With that, she left the room hastily. 

"She doesn't even have a watch on her wrist," Ross observed. 

"Another contraction!" Monica cried as Chandler held out his hand for her again and couched her through it. 

Once it was over, Chandler told her, "They're getting closer together. Our babies are gonna come soon!"

"Oh God, I'm so scared. Aren't you scared?"

"For myself…no. But for you…" he trailed off when Ross gave him a look. 

"No. You'll do fine because you're amazing." 

"Really?"

"Of course," he answered her. And then he turned to Ross and mouthed, "Thank you."

Just then, their conversation was interrupted when Monica's parents barged in. 

"Monica!" Judy cried as she went over to her side, nearly knocking Chandler over. 

Monica rolled her eyes, "Mom…"

"Oh my God, I can't believe you're finally having children," she said as she held back tears, "My only daughter's having babies." By then she was crying out loud. 

"Guess I can't call you my little harmonica anymore," her father lamented. 

Monica smiled, "You can."

Jack smiled back at her, "Good, because I was gonna anyway."

He gave her a kiss on the forehead, "I love you. Now, I'm gonna go get some food from this joint. Can I interest you in some crushed up ice?"

"No, I'm good." 

"Suit yourself," he told her as he turned to Chandler, "You gonna come? Get some coffee?"

"No, I'll stay here."

"No sweetie. You go for a little. The babies'll still be in here for a while."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. You still have a little till the next contraction."

"Good. I'm a little thirsty," he admitted before he kissed her softly on the lips and went out.

"Rub it in my face, why don't you?" Monica said under her breath.

          Once they left, Judy questioned, "Are you nervous?"

"What do you think?"

"I was petrified when I gave birth to Ross. And I was still scared when I gave birth to you, too. But once it's over…it's probably the most overwhelming feeling ever. To hold your child in you arms. The child who, just a few minutes before, was living inside of you. The child that you created with that man that you love. And it's your child, forever."

Monica had tears running down her cheeks, "Why are you crying?" her mother questioned.

"I don't know," she wailed as her mother put her arms around her.

Ok, the second part is up, too. I just decided once I wrote it, that it was really long for one chapter. I always really hate long chapters because, if you have to stop in the middle of reading, it's like impossible to find where you are. So, please continue reading. Thanks!


	16. tow monica and chandler's babies pt 2

TOW Monica and Chandler's Babies

Ok, here's the 2nd part to TOW Monica and Chandler's Babies. Please read and review! Thanks. 

**Disclaimer:** Same as the first part…and all the chapters, actually. 

          After Chandler got his coffee, he went into the waiting room to find the gang. Instead, he saw his mother there, reading a magazine. 

"Mom?" he questioned, surprised, "I thought you were in California."

"I was. But then, when I checked my messages, and heard that Monica was in labor, so I flew right over." 

"Don't you have like, really important things to do there?"

"Well yeah. But you didn't think I was going to miss one of the most important day of my child's life, did you?"

He smiled as she hugged him and kissed his head, "I hate that I've missed so much in your life." 

"I'm just glad you're here." 

"Me too."

After a moment of silence, Chandler began nervously, "Mom, I'm so terrified."

"About Monica giving birth? Because it is so unlikely that anything will go wrong…"

"No, I know that. I mean I'm nervous about that, too, but I'm more nervous about being a father."

"Why? You're gonna be fine."

"What if I'm not? I mean what if I turn up like dad? I leave my wife and kids and…well not be gay, but do something else. I don't want to, but he did…"

Nora interrupted him, "You won't. You know why?"

Chandler shook is head. 

"Because you're not your dad. In fact, you two are exact opposites from one another."

"But he's my dad,"

"So? That doesn't mean you'll do what he does. You're not cheating on your wife with anybody, especially not with the houseboy, are you?"

"Well no."

"And why not?"

"Because I love her."

"There's the difference."

"What?"

"We weren't in love, sweetie. We never were. It's a totally different situation. It's not that your dad left because you were born. He left because the two of us couldn't stand each other." 

"Really?"

"Yes. He came back to see you when you were younger, didn't he?"

"Well, yeah."

"Swim meets, birthdays, graduations, everything."

"Yeah."

"It won't happen with you though, because the two of you are in love. I wish that I had even half of what you have with someone. But I never did. So, the fact that my son has it…it just makes me so happy."

Chandler smiled, "It's never too late for love."

"Now you sound like the romance novelist."

"I only learned from the best," he complimented as he kissed her cheek. 

Then, Joey came out with a sandwich in hand, "Monica's looking for you. Her exact words were, 'Joey, find Chandler and don't come back in my room with that repulsive sandwich'." 

Chandler and Nora chucked. 

"Ok, I'm coming."

"I'll come with you. I want to wish Monica luck."

"Don't come too close to her though," Chandler warned as he held up his arm, "She scratches." 

Nora laughed, "Most woman only squeeze."

"Yeah, well, Monica's one of a kind." 

          After another hour or so, Phoebe, Chandler, and Rachel were in Monica's room. 

"You know what I just realized."

"Do we want to know?" Rachel asked.

"Of course!"

"What?"

"Soon, all the women in here will have given birth…and each to a different amount of babies."

Chandler looked at her strangely, "Ok. I got none of that."

"No look!" she said pointing to Rachel, "She had one kid," then she pointed to Monica, "she had two," and then to herself, "And I had three."

"I think that the only answer for that would be…o…k…"

          Finally, after about seven hours, the doctors told Monica it was time to push. 

"Ok, everybody clear out, aside from the father," the nurse warned the four other friends and the three soon-to-be grandparents.

"Aww, can't we stay?" Phoebe asked, "I can sing!"

"NO!" Chandler and Monica answered at the same time.

"Fine. I can tell when I'm not wanted." 

With that, the seven others wished Monica and Chandler luck and left the room. 

"Ok," the doctor told Monica, "It's time to start pushing."

Chandler kissed Monica's forehead, "Come on babe, it's time to have our babies." 

Monica sat up slightly and began to push. 

"Ok, you're almost there," the doctor assured her. 

She dug her nails deeper into Chandler's skin and pushed some more. 

"I can't do this," Monica cried, "It's too hard." 

"Come on, of course you can! You're Monica…the strongest woman out there. I mean, if Rachel can do it…"

"I can do it!" she assured him, her competitive side kicking in.

Chandler smiled broadly, expecting her to react that way. 

"Ok, the baby's head is out, so one more push!"

Suddenly, there was a blood-covered baby in the doctor's arms.

"Congratulations…you're first born is a girl."

Both Monica and Chandler were close to tears. 

"Would the father like to cut the umbilical cord?"

Chandler did so and sniffed, "Eww…this is _so _gross."

After about two minutes, the doctor warned her, "Ok, looks like this second baby's not wasting anytime."

"I have to push again?" Monica questioned exhaustedly. 

"Come on, you can do it!" Chandler assured her as she began to push again. 

After some more time, the second child was out. 

"It's a girl," the doctor informed them.

Again, Chandler cut the umbilical cord and they cleaned off the second baby. He then went over and kissed Monica on the lips.

          The nurse brought over the babies and handed the first born to Monica, while she handed the second to Chandler. The two held the crying babies in silence. Both had tears streaming down their faces and were watching the babies in awe. Finally, Monica was the one to break the silence. 

"I can't believe they're here."

"Me neither," Chandler looked up, "I'm totally amazed by you. You were just…amazing."

"I know." 

"Our two baby girls need names," Chandler informed her, "Unless you want to call them baby girl number one and baby girl number two." 

Monica chucked, "I know. Do you have anything in mind."

"Nope. I'm leaving it completely up to you. Whatever names you choose."

"Really?" Monica asked ecstatically, "Why?"

"Oh come on. You deserve this. You've done all the work. Plus you'll probably hate my ideas, so I didn't think up any."

Monica smiled, "Okay!"

"Okay!" Chandler agreed. 

"Melissa and Carly."

"That was fast."

"I've thought about it a lot."

"Why am I not surprised?"

She ignored his joke, "Do you realize why I chose those names?"

"No, why?" 

"The "M" name is for Monica and the "C" name is for Chandler."

Chandler smiled broadly, "That's so clever! You're a genius."

"I know. Ok, so who gets which name?"

"I say each of us gets the one we're holding."

"Good call. I'm not the only clever one here."

"Thank you," he said and kissed her deeply.

"What was that for?" she asked, catching her breath.

"For two beautiful children."

Monica began to cry, "You're so sweet. Thank you, too, for two beautiful children."

Chandler was crying, too, "Ok, enough thank you's."

"Ok. And stop crying. You're not the one with the out of control hormones."

"It's just so amazing."

"I know. Okay, you're off the hook for now."

"I love you so much!" Chandler told Monica as he looked at their two children. And I love them, too." 

          Chandler came into the waiting room, tired, but happy. 

"Are they here?" Judy questioned.

A small smiled formed on his lips. "They're here."

"So, can we see them?" 

Chandler nodded and they all followed him into Monica's room. Monica was holding both babies when they arrived, but Chandler picked up Melissa.

Chandler urged Monica and she began, "We want you to meet Melissa Judy Bing," she said as Chandler brought her forward to Judy and Jack, "And Carly Nora Bing," Monica continued as Nora picked up Carly. 

Everybody in the room was crying at that point, as the babies were passed on from grandparents to the rest of the friends. 

"You are so cute," Phoebe cooed as she rocked Carly back and forth, "You look nothing like your father. With the dark curls and all. That's a good thing."

"Hey!" Chandler defended.

"I'm just joking." But then she whispered, "No I'm not," to Carly. 

"Maybe someone else should hold her for a while," Rachel decided as Ross took Emma, so she could hold Carly. 

Meanwhile, Joey was holding Melissa and standing next to Chandler. He was crying hysterically, "I can't believe she's yours!" Joey told him, "She's just so cute!"

"Ok, let's not insult the father here." 

"These two are going to have their daddy wrapped around their pinky fingers," Nora commented as she took Melissa from Joey, "They both have his eyes." 

"How come you didn't name either of them Joey?" he questioned, insulted. 

"Because…they're girls…" Monica answered.

"So? Name them Josephine."

"Eww!" 

"Besides, we were using the first letters of our names for theirs. And Joey doesn't start with an M or a C," Chandler explained.

Joey wrinkled his forehead for a moment, and then realized what they meant.

"There ya go!" Chandler commented.

"So…no problem…name one Moey."

"I don't think so."

"Coey?"

"No!" Monica warned.

"Coseph? Moseph?" 

"We'll think about it," Monica relented.

"Really?" 

"Yeah and I just though about how my answer will be 'absolutely not'. Now get out of my room."

Chandler added, "Yeah. Go get a sandwich or something."

"Fine," he huffed, "But only because you asked me to."

"Right…"

He left, but reentered after a moment, "Can I have $5? I spent my last $10 on candy."

"Oh my God! You spent $10 on candy?!"

"Hey!" Joey defended, "It was good candy!"

Ok, that's it for my series, I guess…omg so sad! Well, there may be an epilogue. But, as I said before, only if people want one. Ok…btw, I know very little about giving birth, since I never had, nor have ever been in a delivery room. So, if I got things wrong, then don't hold it against me, please! Everything is pretty much what I've seen on TV and/or learned in Health class. Eww…it's gross. Last year, we had to watch a birthing video. Well, at least when/if I give birth, I won't have to watch…lol. Ok, please leave a review, thanks! You've been a great…umm…audience (?). I don't know what to call it…lol.:)


	17. tow a very busy christmas

TOW A Very Busy Christmas

Some people asked for an epilogue, so here it is! It takes place around five years after tow chandler and monica's babies (the last fic in this series). And it's Christmas, just to keep w/in the holiday spirit of the time of the year now. The twins are five (duh lol), and they have a two-year boy named Matthew (lol it works, so I'm using the name!), and a baby boy, Corey. Umm…hmm…that's pretty much it, I guess. Oh and Rachel and Ross aren't together b/c that's way too much of a hassle, and same for Joey and Phoebe, Rachel and Joey, blah, blah, blah. Oh and Emma's six years old (also pretty much a duh there, too). Ok, that's about all u need to know. I hope u enjoy! 

**Disclaimer: **I don't own the six friends, but I do own all the Bing kids, yay! 

          "Hey Pheebs," Chandler greeted as she entered Monica and Chandler's house, "Where's everyone else?"

"Oh, they're coming later. I came early to spread some holiday joy!"

Chandler raised an eyebrow as he continued to feed baby Corey, "Great. Thanks, I guess." 

"So, where are the rest of the kids?" 

"Everyone's still sleeping, I guess."

"I thought it was too quiet in here."

"It'll get loud soon. I mean it's Christmas. Present time! They're still worn out from last night, though." 

"They were a little crazy last night at the Christmas party."

"Just a little?"

"Right. I think that Matty got hold of some of the eggnog…" 

"Nah, he acts like that all the time. Good luck with him tonight, by the way." 

"And why is it that Joey and I are both taking him this year?"

"Because Ross won't do it anymore."

"Right…Matty broke his dinosaur toys."

"They're not toys, Phoebe," Chandler said, mocking Ross, "They're collectables." 

"You do a good Ross."

"Thank you. Thank you very much."

"Ok, now you're overdoing the jokes."

"Sorry." 

Suddenly, there was a thud upstairs and Monica screamed, "Matthew, get over here right now!"

"Uh oh, looks like the trouble maker's at it again," Phoebe commented. 

After she said that, Matthew ran down the stairs, completely naked, screaming, "It's Christmas, it's Christmas!"

Chandler tried his hardest to stifle the laugh that threatened to emerge as he saw his son, and then an extremely angry Monica chasing after him.

"Chandler!" she demanded, "Get your son under control!" 

He laughed and kissed her on the cheek. Then he began chasing after Matthew.

"Come on Matty! You can only get your presents if you get dressed." 

Matthew ran back up the stairs, and Chandler followed him, and grabbed the boy while he was running up the stairs. 

"Gotcha!" he remarked as he took his squirming son upstairs. 

When they were out of sight, Monica sighed deeply and began burping Corey. 

Phoebe turned her gaze towards Monica. "Joey and I are going to die taking care of that little hell riser, aren't we?"

Monica laughed, "Hopefully he'll wear himself out by then."

"Where does he get all that energy from?"

"I wish I knew. Then I could shut off the damn energy source."

"You can stop feeding him. That might do the trick."

Monica rolled her eyes, "I want my son to be alive."

"Right." 

"Anyway…he gets all his energy from Chandler's side of the family." 

"Yeah?"

"Well, according to Nora, Chandler acted just like Matty does now." 

"They sure look alike."

"I know! It's like a little Chandler running around screaming all the time." 

Just then, Matthew ran back down the stairs, but this time, he was wearing pants. 

"Well, he's half dressed. That's something," Phoebe commented.

Monica grunted in response. She was watching the father-son wrestling match in front of her. Chandler had caught Matthew by the side and was attempting to put on his shirt. 

"It looks like Chandler still has some of that boundless energy." 

"Nah, not really," Monica informed Phoebe, "Once he's done with Matt, he'll be panting like a big ol' dog." 

"Hey, I heard that!" Chandler informed Monica. 

"Good."

"You know, you _could _help me get a shirt over this kid's head." 

"Yeah, I could," Monica teased, "But it's more fun to watch you do it all alone." 

"Ha, ha, ha," he said sarcastically as he let go of Matthew, "And he's off!" 

          Once that was over, Rachel, Ross, Emma, and Joey entered their house.

"It's so cold out there!" Joey whined.

"Well, it is winter…" Chandler pointed out. 

"We should go to Hawaii. It's warmer there."

"Sure. We'll do that with the spare time and money we have floating around," Rachel commented while taking off her coat. 

Emma began to pull at Ross' coat, until he asked, "Where are the girls? I need to get this one," he pointed to Emma, "Off of me."

"They're upstairs, maybe still sleeping," Monica informed Emma, "But you can go wake them up."

"Say 'thank you' to aunt Monica," Rachel warned. 

Emma rolled her eyes and mocked Rachel, "Thank you aunt Monica." 

Rachel breathed out heavily. "I don't know how you two can handle four kids. Emma's more than enough for me to handle." 

"Matthew's worse than one kid," Ross pointed out bitterly.

"Get over it Ross!" Rachel warned him, "They're just stupid dinosaur toys and it was over a year ago!"

"Yeah Ross," Monica added, "He's not even three years old yet."

"Yeah well…" Ross searched for a comeback, but couldn't think of anything to say. 

"Good one, Ross," Chandler commented as he poured coffee for his friends. 

Monica looked around the kitchen for a moment. "Can you believe it," she began thoughtfully, "Who ever thought that we would ever be here?" 

"Well technically," Phoebe explained, "Joey and I aren't even there yet."

"Yeah, and Ross and I aren't married to anyone," Rachel added. 

"So it's more like, who would've ever thought that _Chandler _would be here?"

They all stared into space pensively for a moment, before it was broken by more screams.

"Mommy!" Carly called from upstairs, "Where's my purple shirt?" 

"Purple shirt?" Chandler questioned.

"I know what shirt she wants," Monica assured it, "Mother's intuition." 

"I know how that is," Ross added. Off everyone's look he asked defensively, "What?"

Monica shook her head and went upstairs. 

"No!" he explained, realizing what he had said, "Not like that." He laughed nervously, "I meant that I've had two kids and seen the mothers with them…"

"Riiiight…" 

"One of his kids has two mothers…" Joey added with a dreamy look on his face.

"Do you have to dream about my ex-wife and her lesbian lover?"

"Yeah baby!" he grinned. 

"Now it feels like a normal Christmas," Chandler stated. 

          After a few minutes, Monica came downstairs, with Melissa following her. 

"Hey Melissa," Chandler greeted as he picked up his daughter and kissed her forehead, "Merry Christmas." 

"Merry Christmas daddy," she replied shyly. 

After exchanging hugs with the others there, she sat down on her father's lap. 

"Did you get me a pony daddy?" she asked excitedly. 

Chandler smiled, "Maybe. Maybe not."

Melissa grinned, "I like those odds!" 

With that she scrambled off her father's lap and ran back upstairs. 

Monica shook her head remorsefully, "Our kids are gonna have your sense of humor, aren't they?" 

"I feel sorry for them," Joey remarked.

"Thanks," Chandler replied sarcastically. 

"Why did you tell her that you might have bought her a pony, when you didn't?" Rachel asked.

"Because I bought her a toy pony."

"Ooo…" Phoebe stated, "Devious."

"I know."

Joey began fidgeting in his seat. "Can we open presents yet?" Joey whined. 

Monica patted Joey's arm, "Yes Joey." Then she called up the stairs, "We're opening presents now! Uncle Joey's getting restless." 

Carly came downstairs and handed Joey a doll, "You can play with my doll if you're bored," she offered sweetly. 

"Well thank you," Joey said and kissed her cheek, "She's so much nicer than you two," he stated, pointing to Monica and Chandler. 

          After the presents were opened and once Melissa stopped screaming about not getting a real pony, Monica began packing her kids' bags. 

"Ok, Carly, Melissa, and Corey are all going with Aunt Rachel and Uncle Ross," she told them as she handed Ross all the bags. He struggled to carry them all out of the house, and tripped on the way. 

The kids began to laugh, and Ross dashed out of the house, embarrassed. 

Chandler placed Matthew in Joey arms as Phoebe carried out his stuff.

"Thank God he's asleep!" she praised as the two left the house. 

Chandler turned to Monica and smiled. "We're finally alone." 

"Yes we are." 

"Would you care to dance?" Chandler asked as he turned on a slow song. 

"Sure. Wow Mr. Bing, you're just as charming as the day I met you."

"You mean Thanksgiving 88'?" 

"Ok, never mind that. You're just as charming as… Ok, this is hard, I give up." 

He smiled and kissed her. "I know what you mean."

"We've sure spent enough time together to understand each other." 

"Mmm hmm…" he answered, his face buried in her hair, "You're hair smells so good." 

"I'm glad you like it. It's not the only part of me that smells so good," she informed him seductively.

Chandler moved his face towards her neck, "Mmm…your neck smells good, too." 

He began to kiss and nibble at her neck, when the phone rang.

"Ignore it," Chandler told her, not stopping.

Monica looked up worried, "But what if something's wrong with the kids?" 

Chandler pulled away, "Ok, go answer it. You'll worry the entire time if you don't." 

"Thank you!" she replied and kissed him quickly before grabbing the phone. 

          An hour later, Monica got off the phone with Carly, who was crying because she homesick. She looked over at Chandler, who was sitting on the sofa, drifting into sleep. Monica climbed into his lap, and he opened his eyes.

"So, you have any of that energy left for me?" 

"I don't know…Matt might have used it all up." He smiled and then resumed kissing her neck. However, the phone rang again.

"Now what?" Chandler asked angrily. 

Monica ignored him and answered the phone. Once Monica bribed Matthew into being good for the rest of the night, she looked back towards Chandler. 

"How'd he wake up?" he complained.

"Joey," she answered simply as she began to climb back on top of Chandler.

"I see," he moved away from her, "One minute!" Quickly Chandler took the phone off the hook.

"Anything will have to wait for an hour or so. They know how to deal with the kids."

Normally Monica would've protested, but she was too busy concentrating on how Chandler was touching her. He then lifted her up and carried her to their room. 

"Finally!" he praised as he dropped Monica on the bed and got on top of her.

          When it was all over, Chandler turned on his side groggily, and glanced at the clock. It was 11:59 PM. 

"Merry Christmas Mrs. Bing," he wished her as she was drifted off to sleep in his arms.

"Merry Christmas Mr. Bing," she answered sleepily as she snuggled closer to him. 

Suddenly, there was a loud banging on the front door. Chandler grabbed his robe and put it on, carefully making his way downstairs. Monica followed him closely behind. Chandler glanced through the peephole, moaned, and opened the door. Phoebe and Joey were standing there with Matt tightly grasped in their arms. 

"Take him, take him!" Phoebe demanded.

Matthew ran past his parents, into the house.

Joey then informed them, "I will _never _have children!" 

Monica and Chandler shared a look and closed the door. They then both glanced at Matt, who just smiled innocently in return. 

"My family," Chandler moaned as he picked up Matthew. 

"But, I wouldn't exchange them for anything," Monica remarked.

"Me neither," Chandler admitted as the three walked up the stairs. 

*sniff, sniff* It's over! *Grabs a tissue* Ok, I can do this! I hope you liked the epilogue and it sorta put an ending on the series. I dunno how it is though b/c it's my first epilogue ever. Well, this was also my first fan fic series, although I've done a few others while I worked on this. Wow, it's finally finished! I'm gonna miss it though…lol. Ok, anyways, enough of that rambling. I just want to add that I got the idea to make Matty run around naked was b/c my cousin used to that. Yeah, it was always a hoot and a half at their place… Anyway, he's older now, so he does other things. But he's a sweetie when he wants to be. Ok, anyways, thanks for reading this series! Please leave me a final review!:)


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